Unexpected Surprise
by Sasssieygirl
Summary: After Vash returns to the girls with his brother he discovers something that will change is life forever. While Knives is recovering from is injuries he's promised his brother he will not hurt anyone, but will his heart heal as well as his body? UPDATED
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hello people, I've decided to review and edit this fic. I've added some scenes and tried to fix typos and what not. Hopefully the story has more depth and is better rounded. For those of you who've been with me from the beginning, I'm sorry. I know I've been terrible when it come to updating, but I plan on finishing this story. Anyway, hope you enjoy. Please REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!

**Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any of the characters from Trigun. **

**Chapter 1**

"I have to go," He said. His fingers ran lazily through my hair.

"I know," I whispered back, silence engulfed us. I gazed into the darkness trying to find the courage to tell him what he needed to know. My stomach was knotting and twisting in unknown patterns. I felt his arm tighten around me. 'You have to tell him' continued to repeat in my head, but if I did he wouldn't go, he wouldn't fight this battle that has held on to his soul for over a century. What I had would have to wait. I could not be selfish. But what if he didn't come back, he would never know and I would be to blame, I had to tell him.

"Vash?" his name danced on my tongue and tickled my lips as it always did. He responded by rubbing his thump across my belly. "I need to tell you something." 'This is it; I have to get it out, no turning back.' I felt him flinch; he moved away from me, he was scared.

"Vash?" concern hugged my words. I set up behind him grabbing his shoulder in concern. I felt him begin to quiver under my touch. 'He's crying again.'

"What's wrong Vash?" He did not answer. He suddenly turned and wrapped his arms around my waist resting his head on my chest. His tears rolled down my torso; he hugged me tighter. 'I wish I could take the pain away Vash, but only you can.' I laid my hands on his neck trying to remind him that I was there for him with out words. We stayed this way for a while, his shaking began to subside, but the tears continued to stream down his face.

"Not now Meryl, it can wait," He unwrapped his arms from my waist and looked into my eyes. "Tell me when I come back Meryl, I don't need anything on my mind while I face Knives. Promise me you'll tell me when I get back, please?" I nodded trying to hold back the tears that were burning my eyes.

"Vash, I will only promise you that if you promise to return to me, please I need to hear you say that you won't abandon us please." The tears began to stream down my face. He wiped them away.

"I would never abandon you, you know that, but I can't promise you that I will come back." He did not look at me while he said this.

"What, how can you expect me to promise you that I'll wait, when you can't tell me you will come back? Vash that's not fair, not to me and especially not to your…" I had to catch myself I almost let myself slip. I have to get a hold of my emotions.

"What Meryl?" He was staring at me, trying to read my face, but I put up my barriers.

"Promise me you'll return and I'll tell you when you come back." He was shocked he almost looked hurt.

"Okay, Meryl. I promise."

That was three months ago and I have been waiting ever since. When he left that morning I only got up to wish him a safe journey and a speedy return. Since then Milly and myself have been trying to make a living with what we have. I told her yesterday that I was thinking about leaving Bernardelli Insurance Society, moving out here and keeping my waitress job for a while, I was really starting to like it. Besides the fact that every male customer had grabbed my butt, the people were quit nice.

"But Meryl, what about Alex?" she asked me about Alex everyday, it was true I missed him terrible and I wanted to see him.

"I don't know Milly, you know why I had to leave him I couldn't put him in harms way." I said rubbing my temples

"But Meryl it's been 3 months I sure he misses you miserably and don't you think it's about time they met." Milly was right, she always was, that's what I love about her.

"Yea it is, you know what Milly I'm going to get him." I said with determination.

"When?" Milly became extremely excited.

"Tomorrow," she was jumping up and down like a child. She was so carefree.

"Wow I can't wait till he gets here! Oh Meryl, can I go?" She asked putting her hands in a pray position.

"No Milly, stay here in case Vash gets back before I do." She slumped down into her chair.

"Oh okay Meryl, but don't be too long. I can't wait to see Alex." She said as her mood immediately improved.

"Sure, I'll only be gone for a week if I hurry."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"It is so hot." Vash whined. The legendary outlaw had been walking for nearly two days with his brother thrown haphazardly over his shoulder. The twin suns offered no sympathy to him as they beat down with all the force they could on him. Every step he took seems to take him back three. 'I have to keep going,' he told himself, 'She's waiting for me.' Vash's thoughts were soon interrupted by a whisper that passed softly across his mind.

"Brother?" Surprised to hear his brother's voice, Vash stopped in his tracks and placed Knives down on the sandy ground.

"Yes Knives, I'm here brother." He answered him through their telepathic connection.

"It hurts brother, it hurts so much." Knives eyes pinched tighter together to emphasis his distress Vash's heart began to ache at the knowledge that his brother's pain was at his hands.

"I know Knives, were almost there, hang on for a little while longer." Vash picked up Knives again and continued on his tread.

"I'm sorry Vash." Vash stopped again not believing what he had just heard. 'Did he just apologize, man I must be hearing things?' With that Vash continued on his way home.

Meryl had left three hours earlier heading home, for December. 'I can't wait to see Alex,' she thought, 'He'll be so surprised.' Since Vash's reappearance, Meryl has not seen Alex and missed him terribly. She thought about him every moment. She just hoped that Vash wouldn't be too upset that she had not told him earlier. 'Well I did try.' She thought, thinking back to the last time she and Vash made love. She wanted to tell him as soon as they reunited those many months ago.

Meryl arrived in December about four hours later. When she got off the sand steamer she headed straight for her dad's house. Meryl got there in a matter for minutes. She knocked on the door and waited anxiously for him to answer.

"Yea, who is it?" A deep male voice thundered through the thick wooden door.

"It's me dad, Meryl." She replied. The door was thrown open a fifth of a second later and Meryl was greeted with a bone crushing bear hug.

"Hi dad," She said breathlessly. "How have you been?" She asked as he released her for his embrace.

"I've been good, a little tired as of late, but I can get by. You know it's nothing I can't handle." Meryl's stomach clinched a little because she was the main reason why her father was so tired, but she knew he did not hold it against her.

"How have you and Milly been, Meryl?" he asked as he escorted her to his spacious kitchen.

"Oh we've been good Dad." She replied while reaching for an apple of the counter.

"So, Meryl not that I'm not happy to see you, but what brings you?" he asked.

"Well Dad, I came for Alex." She said biting in to her apple.

"Oh." He said sounding upset.

"What's the matter, Dad?" She asked concerned for her father and scared he was going to say something was wrong with Alex.

"Nothing I've just grown fond to having him around, that's all. Anyway he's in your old room playing." He pointed towards the hallway leading to her room. Meryl smiled at her dad before leaving the kitchen heading for her childhood bedroom. When she got there a baby boy of about a year or so was sitting on the floor playing with wooden blocks. As if sensing her presence he turned as soon as she entered the room. As soon as he saw her he became full of joy and excitement and reached for her to pick him up. Meryl happily obliged to his obvious request.

"Hello Alex, did you miss Mommy?" She asked the baby while she hugged him in her arms. She had so wanted to do this for so long; she missed the feeling of him being in her arms so much she almost didn't want to

ever put him down again. Her father walked in the door behind her a few moments later smiling at his daughter and grandson.

"He missed you terribly, Meryl." He said leaning on the frame of the door. "He cried for three straight weeks before he finally got settled." Meryl's heart dropped when he told her this, she immediately regretted ever leaving him.

"Oh, I'm so sorry sweetie; I never wanted to leave you." She explained to the oblivious toddler.

"Have you told his father yet, Meryl?" Her father asked her as he followed her to the living room. Meryl's head hung at the question, not wanting to answer it.

"No," she said sitting on the couch "I haven't told him yet."

"Why not Meryl, don't you think he deserves to know he's someone's father?" he asked as calmly as possible.

"Yes, I know he does, it's just too hard to tell 'him'. I mean," tears started to well in her eyes; she tried desperately to hold them back. "I did try to tell him Dad I really did, but he told me to wait till he returned." Meryl was now streaming tears, her father wanted to help her with her problems, but he knew she was more than capable to solve her dilemma.

Meryl was so much like her mother, she too would seem to be totally freaked out, but she always had her situations totally under control. She had died when Meryl was only a child, but Meryl managed to find a way out of her depressions she developed when it happened, so her father was far from worried about her solving it. It was just the parts in between that bothered him.

"Dad," she said bringing him out of his reverie "I'm going to turn in; Alex and I are going to start out early tomorrow, so I'll be back sooner. I don't won't Milly to worry." 'Or worse, Vash beats us back.' She thought. Her father knew she didn't want to talk about her problems anymore so he allowed her to go on to bed, he too followed suit a few moments later.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Vash was so tired he almost gave up, 'Why don't I just stop trying and die, then the world would be safer. Yea, no Vash the Stampede and no Millions Knives. But I can't. I can't hurt Meryl. I have to keep going I promised her I would return.' After Vash gave himself a pep talk he began to see the town come into view. 'Please don't let that be a mirage.' He prayed to himself. He continued to advance and saw that it was quit still and even the saloon looked empty.

He walked in the direction of the little house he and the girls shared. When he got closer to it, he saw that it too look dark. His stomach began to cringe in fear that he would not find them, 'I asked her to wait. Please let her be here.' He walked up on the porch and knocked on the door and waited patiently for an answer. He stood waiting for about five minutes, he stated to knock again when he saw a light illuminate from the window. He was glad because Knives and the walk began to bear down on him. He slowly fell to his knees before a half sleep Milly appeared on the other side of the door.

"Who is it?" She asked not really looking.

"Hi Milly," He said with all the energy he could muster. At hearing his voice Milly's eyes shot open and looked down at the tired plant.

"Vash, oh my, come in, He looks terrible." She said as she bent down next to Knives, forgetting about Vash. She put her hand to his forehead to check his temperature.

"Oh my, he's burning up let me get him inside so I can cool him down." She picked up Knives and carried him to Vash's room. Vash's eyes followed her in disbelief; she had totally forgotten he was there.

Vash figure he was on his own and propped himself up on the frame of the door, he then reached for the doorknob and pulled himself up. Vash walked slowly back to his room, when he got there Milly had stripped his brother of all of his clothes. Vash couldn't believe his eyes.

"Milly, what are you doing?" He asked her leaning on the doorframe.

"I'm," She said grabbing a white cloth from the nightstand. "Trying to cool him down, Vash. Now if you don't mind I would appreciated it if you would go get so rest and try to not make yourself sick and I have to take care of you too." She demanded.

Vash silently obeyed in fear of Milly's wrath. Milly continued to rub down Knives body with the cold towel. 'He's kind of cute.' She thought as she wiped the dirt off his face.

"How can someone so cute cause so much hurt and pain. I guess people think the same about Mr. Vash, but everything he does is unintentional, but you, you mean to hurt people. I wonder what happened to you, why did Vash end up the way he did and you this way. Well what ever it was I know you didn't deserve it, you look like too much of an angel."

Milly continued to talk to Knives, oblivious to the fact that he was well aware of her presence. He listened intensely to her every word, he never knew anyone to speak of him in such a kind manner except for Rem. He immediately hated this spider that was touching him, but he continued to let her minister to his body, the cool towel did feel nice on his hot skin, he would deal with this spider in due time.

Meryl returned home in the early morning, she was very anxious to see Milly and hopefully Vash had not beaten her back. She walked into their house with Alex on her hip. She moved through the small house towards the living room, where she knew she would find Milly. When she got there Alex immediately reached for Milly and Milly reached back.

"Hello little guy." Milly greeted the child cheerfully. Meryl put him down on the floor so that he could walk over to Milly. When he began to walk Milly's eyes filled with tears of joy.

"When did he start walking?" She asked looking up at Meryl.

"About two weeks ago, or so my Dad says." She replied

On his way towards Milly, he turned his direction when he saw another person sitting in the room. Meryl followed him with her eyes wondering why he was going in that direction. Alex got closer to the chair that set in the corner of the room. Meryl saw feet as Alex closed in on the chair. Her heart was caught in her lungs when she saw the person sitting in the chair was Vash. Alex got to Vash's legs and reached for him to pick him up.

Vash stood looking at the yellow haired child stunned; Alex's whining brought Vash out of his daydream. He reached down and picked him up into his arms. The child was lost in the sea of his arms; he was so little compared to Vash. He continued to stare at the child in his arms that looked an awful lot like him. No one in the room breathed, waiting in anticipation of the next moment, the only one aware was Alex. As if knowing Vash his whole life, he hugged him around his neck and spoke his first words to him.

"Dada" Meryl's heart dropped into her stomach when that word came out of her baby's mouth, 'How did he know Vash was his father? I have never shown him pictures or anything.' Meryl suddenly began to fill lightheaded and the next thing she knew everything went black. Vash and Milly both ran to Meryl's side when she collapsed.

"Meryl?" Vash yelled as he reached for her hand.

Milly began to check her temperature and her breathing, when she was convenience she would live she let out a sigh of relief. With that she rose from the floor and went to check on Knives. He couldn't help but feel anxious and worried about her, he had never seen Meryl faint before.

He began to ponder why, 'was it what the baby had said to me?' In the mist of his thoughts he felt a small hand brush his own; he looked over slightly at the baby that crawled to his mother's side.

Vash was blown away by the calmness of this innocent child. To him Meryl was just sleeping, not sick or anything. To him nothing else existed but him and her, he did not sense the fear that radiated from Vash, he did not sense the tension that would soon follow when she came to, all that mattered to him was that she was there.

Vash had never thought of Meryl in that manner, maybe if he did they would have been for real together a long time ago. Not just casual sex. If he had, maybe he wouldn't have been someone's father.

Meryl began to stir which caught Vash's attention. He gently put his arms around her and gracefully picked her up, careful not to alarm her, because if he did he would face her furious fist. He walked over to the couch, followed by a small stalker. He set down with her in his lap, gently cradling her head in his hands.

'I have to talk to her, Meryl you have to wake up.' He began to rock slightly, bringing her closer to him as a mother does a frighten child. Speaking of children Vash felt Alex touch his leg, begging for his attention. Vash smiled down at him and he picked him up with is false arm. Vash felt complete with both Alex and Meryl in his arms.

For the first time since Rem died, he felt happy, truly happy. He had dreamed that this would happen to him in some way, but he had concluded that that particular dream would never make it to reality, but he was more that wrong and he was happy about that.

He had the woman he loved in his arms. His brother was under control for the moment, and apparently a love child gnawing at his shirt. This was heaven to him, a well deserved heaven, for the first time in a long time Vash could truly relax and enjoy his life and that is just what he intended.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

I woke up in the living room feeling unbelievable comfortable. I can't remember being this content. I didn't want to disturb my newfound peace so I closed my eyes again to try and hold on to the moment a little longer. But it was soon interrupted by a small cry for attention.

"I'm coming sweetie," I said feeling very reluctant to get up from where I rested, but my motherly duties called. When I attempted to get up something pulled me down in protest. I thought it was just my own body fighting against me, so I attempted again, but the resistance persisted. I turned to see what it was that was preventing me from moving and was greeted by the sleeping face of none other than Vash the Stampede.

A smile clad my features as I stared into his beautiful face, he looked peaceful, I have never seen him sleep so calmly before and I have stared into his sleeping face plenty of times. I blushed slightly as I remembered the countless times we were caught in the heat of passion, but little did we know that we would fall in love and produce a child. I sure wasn't expecting it.

When Vash and I entered our agreement of sex and nothing more, I was more than sure it would be just that, considering that I couldn't stand the ground he walked on. I was just physically attracted to him, I mean who wouldn't be he's gorgeous. I was sort of surprised when he brought it up.

"Hey Insurance Girl, can I talk to you a minute." He asked me a little unsure of himself. I agreed not reading into it too much, now I wish I had.

"Yea, what is it." He waved his hand at me to follow him into a small café. He motioned for me to sit in a chair across from him. The table he picked was hidden in the back of the small place. It had a dark homely feel it was very comfortable. The double suns shined through the satin curtains that hung high from the rods, it was quite beautiful and much unexpected for Vash's taste.

"So, what's up?" I said feeling a little too relaxed, I guess it was the café; it just made me feel so at ease.

"Well, what I wanted to talk about, or should I say ask you was, since you're going to be following me for a while, I was just thinking that maybe we could take advantage of each others company. I mean, what I'm trying to say is that maybe we could, you know, man this was so much easier when I was asking my mirror."

He slammed his head down on the table in frustration. I had no idea what he was trying to ask me, I tried to help him out a little, but I just couldn't put it together.

"Vash, why don't you just out and say it?" I said feeling a little annoyed.

"Fine," he said just as annoyed. "Do you want to have casual sex?" I was quite speechless, when he asked me that that was the last thing I expected from him.

"What?" I said in surprise and for a lack of words.

"I mean, it doesn't have to mean anything, just considering were going to be together for a while, why don't we take advantage of one another. I mean you don't have to if you don't want to."

"Oh, I see." I put my head down seriously thinking about it. I mean Vash was quite the looker, he was very attractive, and I have had a few naughty thoughts about him in the past, but nothing to this extent.

"Vash, this is not a yes, but it's not a no either, it's a maybe, I need time to think about it, ok?" He nodded his head understanding fully.

Later that night I was pacing my room trying to figure out what I was going to tell Vash, I knew he had expected me to answer him pretty soon. I wanted to jump over that table and have my way with him when he asked me, but I had to restrain myself, I had to approach this as cautious as possible.

What if he was playing with me, what if this was so sort of sick game he played on unsuspecting women. No, what am I thinking, this guy is an idiot, he's not that complex. I resolved that I would follow up on his offer, besides it had been ages since the last time I had been with someone else, and I hadn't realizes how much I need it till Vash brought it to my attention.

I walked slowly down the corridors of the small hotel till I reached his bedroom door. I stated to knock, but decided to try the door first, it was open. I slipped in as quietly as possible, I figured he would be sleeping, but I was soon proven wrong when he gasped when he realized

I was there. I continued to walk towards him despite the holes he was staring through me.

I reached his bed a little faster then I wanted to, I was so nervous, and I can't believe I'm being so childish. I was behaving like an inexperienced teenager. I could feel the tension bear down on us as I climbed in the bed next to him, he moved over a little allowing me room. I turned to him slightly. I wanted so badly for him to rip my clothes off and do his worse, but I resisted.

"Now Vash, I want no feeling or anything of that nature if I agree to this, this is just casual sex nothing more, ok." He nodded his head. I was relieved when he made the first move. He softly pushed me down onto his bed and claimed on top of me, he straddled me hips with his legs, I tensed a little when I felt him grab my breast thought my nightshirt.

The sensation the action sent through my body caused a small moan to escape my lips, I saw him smirk at my respond to his ministration. He then slowly ran his hands down my breast to my stomach and to the hem of my nightshirt. He lifted it quickly over my head; he then went to remove his own shirt.

Vash once again grabbed my breast, this time they were free of all barriers and he could give them the full attention they deserved. He began to flick his thumbs over my nipples causing the pink flesh to stand at attention. I moaned softly when he replaced his fingers with is tongue, his wet tongue against my hot flesh drove me wild, my moans became slightly louder.

He begins to suck on the erect flesh, while fondling the other with is hand. He continued to play with my breast till I was breathless and well aroused. He moved down my naked body living butterfly kisses down my stomach and around my belly button, I giggled a little when he stuck his tongue in to my navel.

His hand soon followed after his mouth in assisting in setting my body on fire, his hands moved faster down my body, they were soon resting on my thighs. He slowly ran them up till he reached my inner thighs, I moaned in anticipation of his next move. He slowly brushed his hand over my sex, he continued to tease me in this manner for a while, and I soon became annoyed.

"Come on Vash." I said breathlessly. He moved up my body till he reached my ears.

"Be patient, Insurance Girl." He whispered into my ear. I went to say something back, but was sidetracked with Vash's hands moving inside my panties.

He ran his fingers down the outer lips of my sex, invoking me to moan. He soon slipped his finger inside me and took it out again, he continued this pattern till I was panting loudly and my moaning filled the small room. Vash inserted another finger into me intensifying the feeling that was building in my stomach.

His movements became more swift and urgent, I soon felt myself fall over in ecstasy, my muscles contracted around Vash's fingers, my natural juices were coated all over his hand when removed his fingers from me. He began to lick the nectar from his hand, which I found very sexy.

Vash laid over me again positioning himself at me entrance. He slipped into me very quickly and in one smooth motion. Vash felt so good inside of me, it hurt a little, but nothing I couldn't handle. It almost felt like my first time again, but it soon passed as he began to move in and out of me.

I soon joined him in his efforts, matching him thrust for thrust. His breath soon became quicker and so did mine. It felt so good. Soon Vash's thrust began too fast for me to match so I just hung on to him and enjoyed him, not soon after I fell into a mind-blowing orgasm.

Vash continued to move inside of me as I released myself, he began to move more urgently inside of me, causing me to have another orgasm, soon after Vash froze on top of me as he came. Vash fell panting on top of me. We laid this way till we both caught out breath.

"Insurance Girl?" He said rolling off of me.

"Yea?" I answered back as I tried to catch my breath.

"How was it?" he blushed as the word left his lips. I giggled at his question.

"It was great, why do you ask, I'm not your first am I?"

"No, it's just been a while, I wasn't sure if I still had my touch." He said reaching for his pants.

"Well, I can tell you one thing, you defiantly haven't lost your touch, and in fact your touch is quite nice. You know I think this is going to be a most invigorating experience, don't you?" I said smiling back at my new found lover as I got out of his bed grabbed my clothes and left his room.

Vash and I continued to meet whenever we were in a town long enough to get a hotel, or we would go off far enough so Milly couldn't hear us, if we were stuck in the desert. It was the best sex I have ever had, and I was pretty sure Vash felt the same, but things started to get difficult around the time of the fifth moon incident, actually it was a few months before.

Vash and I had been going strong with our night life and had no intentions of stopping, but after we were finished we stayed in each others arms longer, or end up staying the entire night in the other's room.

One time we were nearly caught, when Milly noticed that I wasn't in bed that night and I wasn't there when she woke. Naturally she came to look for me and went to get Vash's assistance.

When she walked in I was standing in nothing but my underwear one the opposite side of his bed, I dropped to the floor and waited for her to leave. Vash told her that I had come by that morning to tell him I was going to do some early morning shopping, because I didn't sleep much the night before. When Milly was convinced that he was telling the truth she left and went to wait for me in our room.

After that I told Vash that we couldn't risk getting caught anymore so we had to stop for a while, or at lease till Milly's suspicion died down. Vash and I didn't see each other for nearly two weeks and I have never been so cranky in my entire life and Vash's mood wasn't any better. I remember we got into a heated argument about something I don't quite remember, but we didn't talk for nearly a week.

After too many mood swings and too many lonely nights I gave up and went to visit Vash late one night. We made up that night in the only way lovers can and all was good in the world again.

Soon after that Vash started to act strange around me, he was being way too nice to me and Vash wasn't the only one who was beginning to act strange. Whenever he came around me I got butterflies in my stomach and my heart began to race.

The day I knew our days of meaningless sex were over was when Wolfwood and Milly left Vash and me in the saloon. They had ran off to see a movie and wanted to be alone, anyway Vash and I didn't speak to one another, usually when we were left alone we would find the nearest room and go at it, but this time was different. I didn't want Vash to take me up stairs and I didn't want to have to hurry because Wolfwood and Milly would be back. I just wanted to sit here with Vash and enjoy his company in a non-sexual way.

Vash must have felt me staring at him because he turned and looked into my eyes, I hated when he did that, it was like he was staring into my soul. I was scared that if he kept looking he would find something I didn't want him to see, so I looked away.

"Don't do that." I said grabbing my drink.

"Do what?" He responded never taking his eyes off of me. "I never say anything to you when you're staring wakes me up from a very good dream. At least I have the decency to stare when you're not sleeping, now that is rude"

"What, I do not wake you when I stare, I mean I don't stare."

"Yes you do, I just don't say anything and besides I like it. I mean I don't like it, I mean, man I don't know what I mean." Vash grabbed his head in an attempt to clear his thoughts

"You like it?" I asked him curious as to what he would say.

"Yea, I mean it's nice to know that you don't just fall asleep afterwards." He began to play with his fingers as if embarrassed to be talking about it.

"Vash can I ask you something?"

"Yea,"

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you ask me instead of Milly?"

"I don't know, it just felt right asking you, it would have been awkward asking her I see Milly as a sister, you know, it would have never worked."

"And what do you see me as?"

"I don't know, I guess I see you as an equal, a challenge, a companion, I just liked you more, in that way I mean, sexual."

"Oh, thanks, I guess." We set in silence for a while, but another question was burning inside of me.

"Vash."

"Hmm?"

"Do you still fell that way; I mean do you see me differently."

"Yea, I do, but I can't tell you, because you'll get mad."

"Why would I get mad?"

"Because on our first time, you said that you wanted no feeling or anything connected to this and if I tell you what I see when I look at you I will be breaking my promise." When Vash said that I knew that things were different no more indifference, but now he had feelings and I was afraid that I did too.

"Vash?"

"Yea,"

"Never mind." I couldn't find anything to say to him, I was speechless I didn't know what to do.

"Meryl?" He said as he turned to me. My ears were burning I couldn't believe what I just heard, Vash had said my name, never before had he spoke it, never. A single tear ran down my cheek I tried to turn away so he wouldn't see it, but it was too late. He grabbed my chin towards him he wiped away the tear with his thumb.

"Why are you crying?" He asked

"Because Vash, you have never said my name before, I wasn't even sure you knew it."

"Oh, is that all I always say it to you when your sleeping." I tried to hide the blush that was very apparent on my face. He lifted my face to him preventing me from hiding from him.

"Meryl, I want to know what it's like to make love to you, not have sex, but really make love to you. I want to kiss you for real not, just in the moment of sex, great sex I might add, but kiss you because I want to. I want to tell you that I love you after we make love, Meryl I don't want this anymore, I don't want to be a stress reliever and I don't want that for you either, Meryl can I please make love to you just one time?"

I couldn't believe my ears, Vash was confessing his love for me and I could feel my soul raising high and screaming at me to comply.

"Yes," Was all I said, Vash and I spent the entire night together; not caring if the others came to look for us, just being here with the other was all we needed.

A few days later Vash put the hole in the fifth moon and he disappeared, Milly and I searched endlessly for him, but to no avail.

I cried the entire night I hugged my pillow tight and released my sorrow into its cotton softness. Two months later Milly and I had returned to December and was working behind a desk again. I missed Vash terribly and I had fell into a deep depression, I wouldn't talk to anyone not even Milly.

As of late, I had been feeling sick and I was quite moody, Milly joked that I was pregnant, but I didn't find it funny at all. I went to the doctor just to end my unease, but when he told me I was two months along, I broke into tears. Later that night Milly came over unannounced and made me tell her everything.

"What do you mean you're pregnant?" Milly yelled at Meryl when she told her the news. "Whose is it, I mean you don't have a boyfriend, or do you? Have you been lying to me Meryl, or is he a secret, why didn't you tell me?"

"Milly calm down," Meryl said sitting down next to her up set friend. "I don't have a boyfriend, but I wasn't totally honest with you either."

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"Well, first of all the father of the baby isn't some big secret, well it's a secret to you, but not to me. Well what I'm trying to say is that through out our travels I have been quite 'active', if you get my drift." Meryl winked at Milly to emphasize her meaning.

"I know I also got a lot of exercise in our travels, running away from people is great exercise." Meryl slapped her forehead in frustration, 'I can't believe what a dunce she is!' Meryl thought.

"No Milly not active like that, active like sexually, you know like having sexual relations." She yelled heated at Milly.

"Oh, I get it," Milly said understanding what Meryl meant by active, then the thought hit her. "With who?"

"Well, Vash," she whispered.

"What I couldn't hear you?" Milly said raising her hand to her ear.

"Vash" Meryl said a little louder, but not loud enough for Milly to hear her.

"What, I still can't hear you; you're going to have to speak up Meryl."

"I said Vash!" Meryl yelled very annoyed.

"What, Mr. Vash, since when, I thought you two hated each other?"

"Well, it stared out that way, but after awhile I guess we started to fall in love, but we had to end our quote on quote relationship."

"Why"

"Because, it would have been too complicated, for me and him," Meryl's eyes began to burn from the tears that threaten to spill over. "It would have made it difficult to continue to follow him around. I just couldn't do it." Meryl now cried freely onto Milly's shoulder. Milly tried her best to console her best friend, but Meryl was beyond any consolation Milly could give.

For the next couple of weeks Milly tried nonstop to cheer up Meryl, but nothing she did made her feel better. Milly wanted to blame Meryl's depression on Vash, but knew that it was not entirely his fault, although most of it was. Meryl's depression did not improve, as she got closer to giving birth, in fact she got worse. Not only was she a depressed downer, she was a moody depressed downer. She was changing channels way too often, one minute she was happy the next she was chewing someone's head off.

The farther along she got the less people wanted to be around her, but Milly was the only on who could tolerate her. But when she gave birth to Alex her mood, instantly improved, it was like he was her own personal ray of happiness. Alex filled her days with new experiences and excitement, but these days were numbered.

A few months before Alex's first birthday, rumors stared to come up that Vash had reappeared, so it didn't take too long for their boss to reassign them to the job of tracking him down. Meryl was some what excited to be seeing Vash again, but terrified all the same.

If she did run into Vash again she would have to tell him about Alex, but she was horrified of what he would do. Milly told her not to worry, and that Vash would take it good when she told him.

When the girl finally caught up with Vash and Wolfwood, things between Vash and Meryl were awkward at first. Neither would talk to the other and they never look when the other was looking. Both Wolfwood and Milly grew tired of their childish behavior after about a week.

"Will you two knock it off already" Milly yelled

"What are you talking about?" Vash asked know full well what Milly was referring to.

"You know what I'm talking about, Mr. Vash, so don't play dumb." She said wagging her finger in his face.

"Milly please don-"

"Don't Milly me. I'm so sick of you too avoiding each other just stop it already." Milly said before storming off, Wolfwood jogged behind her to calm her down leaving Vash and Meryl alone.

"I guess she's right." She said leaning against a near by building.

"Yea, she is, but," Vash said joining her. "I never knew it was so obvious."

"Are you kidding," she said smirking at him. "I haven't whacked you one since I've got here, don't you find that strange?" Vash laughed at Meryl's comment, but didn't respond.

"Vash," Meryl asked after a moment of silence.

"Yea" he answered pushing his glasses further up her nose.

"You wouldn't freak out if I told you something dramatically life changing would you?" Vash turned to her slightly, but never changing his expression.

"Depends on what it is and how life altering it is, why do you ask?" He said now looking fully at her.

"Oh, no reason. Just wondering." She lied trying to get him to drop the subject.

"No way, you would ask something like that unless it had a part two, so what is it?" He took off his glasses

"It's nothing, I was just curious."

"What ever, you're never 'just curious', you have something to tell, don't you?"

"I said no" She raised her voice slightly in annoyance.

"I don't buy it, why don't you just tell me?"

"Why don't you just drop it, broom head." Her voice raising more.

"I would if you just tell me what this is about." He yelled back just as aggravated.

"What am I supposed to tell you if I don't have anything to tell you?" she said now yelling to the top of her lungs.

"The truth would be nice." The two were now drawing a crowd, but were too caught up with the other to notice.

"What truth, there's nothing to tell you."

"Why don't you stop being so stubborn and spill it woman!"

"No"

"No, what do you mean no, yes"

"No"

"Yes"

"No"

"Yes"

"No"

"You know what this is stupid."

"No, you're stupid."

"I know you are but what am I."

"Oh please, that is so childish."

"You just called me stupid, and you're calling me childish, your one to talk."

"I can't be childish I more than half your age."

"So what, you're twice as mature?"

"My point exactly." People soon started to leave the scene since it had lost its luster. The two continued to argue till Milly and Wolfwood returned and broke them up.

"What the hell was that about, Vash?" Wolfwood asked Vash when the two were finally alone.

"I don't know she's just acting so stupid lately." He said falling face first into his bed.

"What do you mean, stupid, I don't understand? How can a Needle Noggin such as you call another person stupid?" He said sitting on the opposite bed.

"I not kidding, I'm serious, she's really acting weird. I think she has something important on her mind."

"Well it is her mind she can have what she wants on it, or maybe it's a someone." Vash's head popped up when those words came out of Wolfwood's mouth.

"What do you mean a someone, it couldn't be, I mean could it?" He said now pacing the floor.

"Why, Mr. Stampede you look a little worried, anything you want to spill?" Wolfwood asked with an evil grin on his face

"I don't have anything to spill, Wolfwood." Vash stated very matter of factly.

"Yea, whatever, then why are you pacing the floor and going crazy over Meryl, why don't you sit down and tell me all about it?"

"Fine I'll tell you, it all started about the time me and the girls first started traveling together. When I first met Meryl I was instantly attracted to her, I mean who wouldn't right?"

"So, for a while I thought I could shake them, but they were persistent, after a while I accepted the fact that these women were going to follow me regardless of what I wanted. So when I finally came to this realization, I also realized that there could be some benefits to have women follow me around, one woman in particular. So one day around the first time I fought the Nebraska Family I asked her would she be interested in a certain proposal."

"What was the proposal?" Wolfwood asked anxious to hear the answer.

"I'm getting there; anyway the thing was that since we were going to be traveling buddies for quite sometime, why not be traveling buddies with benefits."

"You asked Meryl to have meaningless sex with you just because, I'm sure she knocked your lights out." Wolfwood grabbed a cigarette out of his left breast pocket as he laughed at the image of Meryl taking Vash's head off.

"No, actually, I was expecting that, but that's not what happened." Wolfwood stopped in mid puff not believing what he just heard.

"She told me she would seriously think about it, I assumed that she was nicely letting me down, but she came to my room later that night and the rest is history." Vash finished his story with a sigh of relief; it felt good to be telling this to another person. Ever since Meryl and his relationship started he's wanted to tell someone about it.

"Wow, so all this time you and Meryl have been getting it on behind my back and you didn't tell me, how dare you, you bastard." Wolfwood joked with Vash, but was secretly kind of upset that he didn't know till now. "But anyway, is that why you're upset about her being with someone else?"

"No and she's not with someone else, we don't know that for sure!" Vash yelled at Wolfwood.

"OK, ok calm down, I was just joking." He said as he but the butt of his cigarette out on the sole of his shoe.

"Ok, but no, that's not why." Vash said plopping down on his bed.

"Then, what's going on in that head of yours?"

"Don't know."

"Ok, well are you two still involved?"

"No."

"Why not, thinks got to complicated or something?"

"Exactly."

"How?"

"Well after a while I liked having her around for more that just sex, I mean after the deed we would just sit and talk, instead of leaving, like in the beginning. After a while I didn't just want to have sex with her I wanted to, I don't know what I wanted, but I didn't want things to be like that anymore."

"Oh I see, you start falling for her."

"Yea, but I wouldn't admit it at first, but one day I just saw something I wanted to touch, but I couldn't reach it the way that we were then. So some how we end up talking about it and come to find out she felt the same. So the night before I put the hole in the fifth moon we made love for the first time, although it was slower then all the many other times, it was so much better, it just felt so much more complete, you know?" Vash was now staring starry in to the night sky. Wolfwood stared at his friend in sympathy, he had officially fallen in love and he didn't even know it.

I remember that day like it was yesterday, after I told Wolfwood about it I couldn't stop thinking about Meryl. He would always give me a look or say something that only we understood to get me to tell her what he thought she should know, but know he would be proud of me because

not only was she lying in my arms, my sleeping son was curled up in the bend of my arm.

I felt her try and stand when the baby started to cry, but I held tight to her. I still held her firmly in my grips when she tried again, by then he had quieted down and Meryl just relaxed back into my arms. I slowly opened my eyes after I felt her take her eyes off of me.

"Good Morning." She greeted me with a warm smile.

"I'll say," She looked up at me not quite aware of the world around her, but as soon as she did all hell broke loose. She bolted up to her feet and looked at me terrified.

"What's the matter?" I asked totally confused.

"What do you mean what's wrong, aren't you mad?" She started to pace the floor.

"Mad, why would I be mad?"

"Because," She stopped pacing and looked me in the eye. "I had your child and I didn't tell you, and the circumstances of which you found out was no the best, because I was a coward and hid him from you for all this time."

"Meryl, slow down." I put down the baby and stood up to try and calm her, but when I reached for her she moved away from me. "Meryl why are you making this harder than what it is I'll admit that I wasn't expecting to have a child when I returned to you, but I'm not exactly mad."

"I'm not making this harder; I'm seeing this for what it is, Vash. I know that I messed up, but you're taking this too lightly, you should be yelling, upset, and angry, but your not, why Vash," Meryl started to cry and it was breaking my heart.

"It would have been easier if you were mad, why do you always do this, why do you always make things not look so bad, when they are? Why Vash, I want to understand." She was now whaling in sadness and I didn't understand why, I was happy that she was here and I was happy about the baby, I wasn't mad at her.

"Meryl I don't understand, why would it be easier if I was mad, don't you want me to be happy about this?" I said as I pulled her into my arms.

"Of course I do, but it's making me feel worse about not telling you, I'm sorry."

"That's ok Meryl, I love you, and that's all that matters, right?"

"Yea." Meryl finally stopped crying, but I could still feel her anxiety.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

A few weeks passed and nothing eventful happened. Vash got to know Alex and reintroduced himself to Meryl. While Milly catered to a very cranky plant named Knives.

Knives had awakened a few days after he and Vash had arrived and was very surprised that Milly was still caring for him and not his brother. Although she was very nice to look at she was still a filthy spider and didn't deserve to touch him, but he had to admit she was caring for him very nicely, even better then Legato or himself.

After a few days of that woman caring for him Knives began to notice certain things about her, like the way her lips looked after she had just licked them, or how her smile seemed to light up his entire room. Knives had never been in the presence of any human this long besides Legato since the great fall. She was interesting and she intrigued him to no end. She did not fear him and did not treat him as a monster, she was different than most humans and he wanted to know why. To say the least, Knives was confused, never in his 130 years of existence has he ever thought of a human in such a way. But for now he will push these thoughts aside and focus on his body healing.

Two weeks after the twins had returned Milly was tending to Knives' wounds. At this point he was almost always conscious. Milly found it difficult at first to care for him while he watched her so closely, scrutinizing her every move. It was unnerving, to say the least. But based on what Vash has told her about his brother she was thankful that all he did was watch.

Knives was secretly grateful for her. He knew that Vash wouldn't and couldn't be this careful with him. Nothing she did hurt him. Pain was something he simply did not like. That was the only trait that he envied about Vash. He had an extremely high tolerance for pain, whereas Knives on the other hand, couldn't stand it at all.

He watched her slowly hover her large, yet delicate hand over his bandaged body before touching him. Strange, he thought. Finally she placed her hand softly on his wounded left shoulder. He flinched, anticipating pain, but none came. She smiled at him. He hated it, being at the mercy of someone so bubbly, even more so than he bumbling fool of a brother. She quickly changed the bandage, painlessly.

"All done." She said smiling up at him. Knives stared back at her searching for a reason as to why she was different.

"You know, my mother always told me it was rude to stare." She said after a few more seconds of his scrutiny. He quickly looked away from her.

"Human wisdom means nothing to me." He folded his arms slowly across his chest. "I am superior to you and your mother."

"That might be, but it's still rude to stare." Milly set back in the chair and mimicked the crabby plant.

"Don't mock me?" Knives said infuriated and confused as to why she was not cowering before him. "I could kill you right know if I wanted to." 'That should teach this spider to fear me.' He thought. He smiled anticipating Milly's recoil.

"Anybody could if they wanted to, I suppose, but why live life in fear of death?" She smiled innocently. Knives' face showed his obvious confusion for a split second. He wanted to be angry, but her answer made so much sense that he could not. He only felt interest.

"Where is Vash?" he grew impatient and wanted to change the subject.

"Probably with Meryl and Alex." Milly placed an inquisitive finger in her chin. Knives marveled at the action.

"Who's Alex?" He knew that the other human garbage his brother tramp around with was that loud harpy woman, she called Meryl, but he didn't know who this Alex person was. Probably some other human waste Vash decided to hook up with.

Milly jumped up nervously. She had said too much.

"Oh, I think I hear someone calling me." She lied leaving the room.

"Whatever," Knives whispered in the dusty sunlight that hung heavily through the small room.

As the days progressed, Milly continued to care for Knives. She was well aware that this was Vash's responsibility, seeing as how this was his brother whom he had shot, but she knew he wanted to spend time with Alex. He had missed his whole life and giving him time to get to know him was the least she could do. She only wished that Knives wasn't so serious. He never thought any of her jokes were funny and stared blankly at her whenever she tried to spark up a conversation. The only thing he ever wanted to talk about was deep philosophical stuff. She knew he was smart, but the simplest truths to her always baffled him.

"I don't understand you," he blurted as she finished checking his wounds. His voices startled Milly. He never spoke to her unless she asked him a direct question.

"What do you mean?"

"You're different from most humans." He answered matter-of-factly.

"Oh," she looked down at her feet, unsure of what to say.

"I don't understand you," he repeated staring out the small window. Milly didn't respond. His words were meant more for him than for her. Sadness filled her heart as she gazed at him lost in thought. She saw so much pain in his eyes. He often had nightmares. She never said anything about them, to him or Vash. His wounds were more that physical. Someone has hurt him deeply and she wished more than anything she could help him heal.

"Poor Mr. Knives," she whispered. Hot tears began to well in her eyes as she thought about what could have made Knives so angry.

"What is wrong with you" Knives asked in disgust. He watched her bottom lip quiver as she tried to fight back the tears.

"It's so sad," she whined. She sat her large body next to him. He instantly became unnerved. "I wish you weren't so angry Mr. Knives." She placed her hand on his shoulder, just below his wound. Knives heard the genuine concern in her voice. It infuriated him.

"I don't want your pity. He pushed her hand away violently.

"Don't be that way, Mr. Knives. Everyone deserves a second chance. You look like you've had a tough, unfair life and I think it's about time you lived life to the fullest. Allow yourself some happiness." She smiled warmly, touching his arm softly. Knives felt a tingle run through his arm from where her fingers rested.

He looked at her a moment longer. She confused him beyond comprehension. She should hate him, should want him dead. But she believed he deserved redemption. Why?

_Everyone deserves a second chance. _He words replayed in his head. They mocked him.

"Leave," he said calmly. Milly did not move. She was not frightened by his callousness.

"Happiness will find you, Mr. Knives, whether you want it to or not. It's like that," she smiled. "No one stays angry forever. Somehow, what ever is holding on to your soul will be pulled loose and you can live a happy life. One that I know you deserve. Look at Mr. Vash. He let go of his demons and look how happy he is. You can have that too, if you want it, but you have to let go." She left him with these words.

Knives stared at the door after she had left. _You can have that too, if you want it. _ The words kept playing over and over in his mind. He couldn't stop them. He hated her so much for this. Somehow, her words had given him hope he didn't realize he needed. She was a filthy spider, unworthy of existence. She had nothing to offer him, not even hope. Knives was furious at himself for allowing her to fill his head with this nonsense. Unable to ponder over this any longer, Knives drifted into a dreamless sleep, which made him glad.

A couple of days later, Milly went to check on Knives as she does ever day, she slipped through the door quietly, mindful that he was sleeping. Milly slowly walked over to his lying form, she admired his shape and was at awe at how handsome he was. She was somewhat ashamed of herself, considering that the man that she was drooling over was the direct cause of Wolfwood's death. She felt that just having these thought she was betraying him, but for some reason she couldn't stop staring at him.

"Will you please stop staring at me?" Knives asked turning his head to stare back at Milly. She jumped at his unexpected statement.

"I'm sorry." She said suddenly finding her fingers very interesting.

Knives slowly set up; the pain of this attempt was written all over his face. Milly instantly ran to his side to scold him for attempting such a thing. She reached out to him touching his chest and back simultaneously. Knives flinched as her soft hands touched his bearskin. The sensation of her fingers along his back sent chills along his spine and wherever her hands touched him they left goose bumps.

Knives had never experienced anything of this nature, but knew immediately that it was not good. Milly felt him freeze under her touch, she wondered why, so she slowly moved her hands up his back and down again in an attempt to calm him. She was surprised when he did not reprimand her for her foolish actions. She had expected him to push her away, but he did not it was almost like he enjoyed her hands on him.

She looked into his eyes and saw a scared look in them, and then there was something else, something she could not place. Then it changed. His eyes became unreadable and angry. She was tugged violently away from his eyes. He pushed her hands away from his body.

"Do not touch me." He closed his eyes and turned his head as to dismiss her, but Milly did not move.

"I wouldn't have to if you didn't do stupid things." She said folding her arms across her chest, Knives' stomach cringed at the action, but he soon ripped his eyes away when he realized that he was staring.

"I don't do stupid thing, woman." He said standing to his feet, ignoring his protesting body.

"Oh really then what do you call this, it looks pretty stupid to me. Are you trying to kill yourself?" she yelled at him as she took a step closer to him.

"What, why would I want to do that, now that was stupid, but what else could I expect from a stupid spider like you." He yelled back in responds, he too took a step towards her.

They were now an inch between them. Milly felt his breath on her lips, as did Knives. Milly went to step away, when she felt herself being grabbed by the waist and pulled, the next thing she knew her and Knives were indulged in a very passionate kiss.

Neither knew what was going on, they knew that they soon would need to breath, they knew that when that moment came there would be a very intense tension in the air, but they did not worry about that right know, they just took advantage of the situation.

Milly was lost in this unbelievable kiss that was coming form this mass murderer, she would have never thought that Knives could kiss this good, she lost her balance in surprise, but Knives caught her before she fell.

Knives could have continued kissing her, but he begin to feel that she was struggling to breathe, so he broke the kiss. He pushed her away, with his hands still resting on her shoulder, he watched as a sea of emotions washed over her face. With her eyes still closed, she slowly stepped back till her back was to the wall, she slide down the wall, attempting to soak up the moment, before it was violated by awkwardness.

Knives watched her travel down to the floor; he watched as her breast bounced as she hit the floor and cursed his flesh for reacting to it. She slowly ran her fingertips across her lips, trying to remember his hot lips against her own. She slowly opened her eyes and looked up at this man that had given her a feeling that she thought died not to long ago.

Knives stiffened under her watchful eye, he was so confused, he hated humans and thought them filth, yet he had just kissed one. Why did he feel this? What spell had she put on him?

Since that day, Vash had started to care for Knives. It was bittersweet. He loved that the awkwardness was gone, but Vash was not as good a nurse as Milly. Vash also was hiding something from him. He knew as soon as he saw his face. Vash was never a good liar. He tried to read his mind, but Vash was prepared. Knives was surprised when he was repealed entry to Vash's inner thoughts. So he decided to try a more primitive method.

"What are you hiding?"

"Nothing," Vash laughed nervously and placed his hand haphazardly behind his head.

"Please, Vash, don't insult me." Knives watched Vash contemplate.

"It's nothing, Knives believe me." Vash lied. Knives wished that his arms weren't lead weights; otherwise he would whack Vash across the face. Instead he sent this visual to his brother.

Vash jumped back. Obviously Knives didn't believe him. I'm not ready to tell him. He thought as he stared into Knives' angered face.

"If you're going to lie, get out." Knives ripped his eyes away from Vash.

"What," Vash whimpered in response. "Knives don't be that way. It's not the right time." Knives felt the honesty and fear behind his words. What could be so bad that he was scared to tell him? Vash never kept secrets from him. After everything, they were always truthful with one another.

"Get out," Knives repeated calmly. Vash obeyed.

A week after, Knives woke early, but wished he could return to the bliss of slumber. There he didn't have to think about his lying rat brother or how uncomfortable Milly made him, or the fact that he kissed her. 'Why did I kiss her?' Continued to ring in his head, he wanted to know that it would not happen again, because if it did it would go against his whole meaning of living, to rid the world of this human garbage. But how could he if he was kissing a spider? He didn't understand. He had been with women before and kissed them, but nothing like this. He wanted to kiss Milly out of something other then pure lust. He wasn't satisfying some animal need. Something about the action was different and he didn't know what and this bothered him.

Knives laid in bed a few more minutes until he finally couldn't take the constant pondering.

He got up slowly. He had only been able to walk for about a week. Even though his wounds were nearly healed he still moved cautiously. He slowly walked to the kitchen. When Knives got there he went straight for the fridge. 'Maybe they have some ice cream in this hell hole.' Luckily it was a small container in the back, but when he closed the door a small set of big green eyes were looking up at him.

"What?" He said to the unnamed child that stared daggers through him. He reached up to Knives, but Knives looked down at the child in utter disbelief.

"I will not touch a filthy human larva." He said to the boy with yellow hair.

"He's not exactly human, Knives." Knives turned toward the voice, but immediately regretted it.

"What do you mean?" He asked her as he set down with his ice cream.

"Well, he's not exactly human, but I don't know what you would call him." Milly answered, leaning against the wall behind her.

"Who does 'it' belong to?" He said pointing his ice cream covered spoon at Alex.

"Oh, well Vash." Milly answered forgetting she wasn't supposed to tell him. Her hand slapped over her mouth attempting to push her words back in, but it was too late.

"WHAT?" Knives stood so fast that the chair fell to the floor scaring Milly and Alex.

"What do you mean Vash, how? I don't get it."

"Calm down Knives." She wished she could take back her words. She put her hands in front to her trying to calm his anger. A combination of anxiety about their kiss and regret over spilling the beans stopped her from touching him.

"Calm down, what do you mean calm down. You telling me that my brother has reproduced a child and I didn't know about it and you're telling me to calm down."

"Yes, that exactly what I'm telling you," Milly yelled back as her patients ran out. "Now sit down and shut up so I can tell you, ok?" Knives couldn't believe that she had the audacity to speak to him, a superior being in such a manner, but he sat down anyway, not in fear, but respect.

"Now, this is Alex," she gestured towards the baby. "And Alex this is Knives." She pointed to Knives. "Knives, Alex is Vash's son, which would make you his uncle, ok."

"OK, but who is the child's mother?" Knives said with all the self-control in his body.

"Meryl."

"I can't believe this." Knives put his head in his hands as he tried to soak in everything she was telling him.

"Knives?" Milly asked after staring at him a few moments.

"Where is my brother?" He said looking up at her.

"In the living room I think." She said sitting across from him. Knives moved to get up, but Alex grabbed at his legs as he stood.

"I think he wants you to pick him up." Milly said amused at his stunned reaction.

"I will not." He said pushing him off gently. Alex not liking the treatment he was receiving swung at Knives and hit him on his shin.

"You little bastard." Knives couldn't believe he had hit him, that was nothing like his brother, must be that harpy woman.

"Don't get mad at him, all he wanted was for you to hold him." Milly interceded. Knives bent down and pick up Alex; he looked him over and resolved that this was no doubt his brother's.

"Ni," Came out of Alex's mouth after looking him over a few seconds.

"How do you know me?" He asked the baby expecting an answer.

"You know, he has a wonderful ability of knowing people without ever meeting them prior, he did the same thing to Vash." Milly and Knives stood in silence as he took in the new information, but this was short lived when Vash came through the door.

"Hey, what with all the yelling?" He asked stopping in mid step.

"Vash" Knives hissed at his brother in disgust.

"Knives, can we talk about this?" Vash whined to his brother. Milly resisted a laugh as Alex was shoved into her arms by an attacking Knives.

"AAAHHHHHH, HELP ME, UNCLE, UNCLE, COME ON KNIVES, I GIVE. PLEASE HAVE MERCY." Vash yelled in agony, Meryl rushed into the room with a panicked look on her face.

"Milly what the hell is going on?" She asked grabbing Alex out of her hands.

"Oh, nothing, Knives is just beating up Vash for not telling him about Alex." Milly explained.

"Oh, I thought it was something serious." With that Meryl put Alex down and went to get ready for work.

Milly watched as Knives, slowly, chased Vash around the kitchen table. It was nice to see them behave like real brothers. Since they had arrived, all Vash did was avoid him. She didn't understand why. Meryl told her it had something to do with her and Alex. She knew he hadn't told Knives about his son, she nearly spilled the beans once before. Now the news was out and Vash was reacting as he always did. He played the silly goofball role, screaming like a girl, but always staying just out of Knives reach.

Seeing that he would not catch up to Vash, Knives grabbed the closes thing to him and launched it, with all his strength towards Vash's head.

After all of the drama died down, Vash went to visit his brother. Knives' back was to him. He was staring up at the stars. He didn't acknowledge Vash when he walked into his dimly lit room.

"Knives," Vash whispered timidly.

"What do you want, liar." Knives words cut him. Vash knew Knives was hurt he didn't tell him about Alex. They had always been truthful with one another, even if the truth hurt.

"Knives, look at me." Knives turned towards him, disappointment in his eyes. Vash had never seen this look from Knives. Malice, hatred, or disgust would have been better than disappointment.

"Knives, I'm sorry." Vash walked closer the small bed where Knives was. "I didn't know how to tell you." Vash pleaded.

"How about, hey bro, I had a kid. That would have worked." Knives spat, full of venom. Vash sat next to him, facing away from him. He couldn't look at him.

"Knives, I need you to forgive me. He's here. There is nothing I can do about that now. I only found out he even existed when I got back with you. I'm just as surprised as you are. I never expected to be a father."

"His existence isn't the issue, Vash. You lied to me. I'm your brother. No one else is like you but me, and you lied to me."

"I said I was sorry. What else do you want me to do? I didn't know how you would react. I like you being here. I like that I don't have to live in fear of what you will do. I like you being my brother again, not my enemy. I missed this, Knives. More than you know. I love you more than anything. Like you said, no one else in this world is like me, but you and I don't want to loose you. I guess that's why I didn't tell you. Alex was something I couldn't bring to you because he was something new to the equation. I feared you would lash out. I thought you would shut me out again."

The twins sat in silence for a while. Knives allowed Vash's words to wash over him. He missed his brother too. He didn't realize until this moment. He was so hurt. He needed Vash to trust him. Despite everything, he loved Vash too.

"It's ok," He whispered, breaking their silence. "This would have made Rem happy." Vash turned in surprise. He pulled his brother close to him, hugging him with all his might. Tears of joy ran down his face.

"Rem," Vash whispered into Knives shirt.

"I still hate her Vash, she made things so hard." Knives said once Vash let him go. "I don't regret what I did. I still believe that the humans are a waste of energy, but now I see that Rem was right about some things." Vash said nothing in fear of Knives recoiling and shutting him out.

"Everyone deserves a second chance, right?" Knives looked up at Vash wanting. He needed an answer.

"Yes," Vash smiled. He heart was so completely full of love for his brother. He had kept his last promise to Rem. _Vash, take care of Knives. _Her last words rang in his mind everyday. "Everyone."

"Even me? I've done so many things that make no sense now. I don't even know why I hate the humans anymore." Knives felt a wetness roll down his face. Vash hadn't seen his brother cry in years. Not since he shot him the first time, but these tears recalled an earlier memory. One of their brief childhood.

"Knives, what's wrong?" Vash asked his brother. He had been looking for Knives for a while and found him in the cafeteria under a table. He was crying.

"He said I was a monster. He said we shouldn't be here." Knives sobbed. Vash ran towards his twin. Knives was always so strong. They were young. They had only been on the ship for about eight months. They looked about six or seven. Knives was still innocent.

"Who, Knives?" Vash embraced him.

"Steve," Knives wiped his runny nose across his sleeve. "He hit me, Vash. I don't know why." His sobs began to grow. Vash simply held onto him as he poured his innocent tears out. Neither of them understood what was happening. Knives didn't understand Steve's fear. He just wanted Steve to like him. He was scared. Vash was scared for his brother. He didn't like to see him cry.

"Come on, Knives." Vash stood up, pulling Knives with him. "Let go to the rec room. That always cheers you up." Knives smiled at his brother. The thought of the warm sun shinning down on them made him happy.

"I'd like that. Maybe Rem will be there too." The boys run out of the cafeteria towards the rec room.

Vash had forgot about that. He could barely remember be so small. Knives was so different then, much like he his right now, but he knew this Knives would revert into darkness again.

"Do you remember the first time Steve hit you?" Knives turned back towards the stars.

"Yes," he answered simply.

"I should have told Rem then. Maybe she could have stopped him." Vash felt the heavy blanket of regret cover him. Steve made their lives a living hell on the S.E.E.D.S ship. There was no escape from him. Knives always got it worst than Vash did. Vash though that Steve though he was too close to Rem and she would notice if he tried too much, so he just roughed him up a little, but never as bad as Knives.

"I wouldn't have mattered. He would have found a way. He was such a dick." Knives stared down at his fingers as he thought of his childhood tormentor. He always made sure Vash wasn't around when Steve was on the rampage. He was too sensitive.

"I tried to save you from him, Vash." Vash's eyes grew in surprise.

"What do you mean?"

"He would ask me where you were. He'd tell me he wouldn't hit me if I told him where you were, but I never told him. I couldn't. I had to protect you from him. From them all. I thought I was protecting you all this time, from the humans. They cause so much pain and misery, but I see I have become worst than them. I need you…" Knives could not finish his sentence.

"What Knives?"

"I need you to forgive me, Vash." For the second time that night, Vash pulled Knives against his body. A whoosh of air gushed out of Knives' body, as he was crush by Vash.

"I forgive you, brother."

A few days passed without problem, Knives was slowly but surly getting used to being an uncle, but his feeling for Milly were continuing to confuse him. Vash and Meryl were now very comfortable about letting their love for one another show. It felt good for them not have to hide it.

Milly on the other hand was not so good. She continued to fight her growing feeling for the surly plant. She knew that her heart never lied to her, but just having these feelings made her feel like she was betraying Wolfwood. Things between them just kept becoming more anxious and tension continued to rise. One day Knives grew tired of being confused and ignorant of these foreign feelings, so he decided to ask his brother.

"I need to talk to you." Knives said to his brother.

"Sure, what about?" Vash said leading his brother to the living room. The twins' relationship has grown since their heart to heart the other night. Knives was more vulnerable around Vash, but not nearly as much as that night. Vash began to trust in Knives' word that he wouldn't kill again. He needed to hear his brother say this. When he promised this, a weigh he didn't even realize was there lifted from him.

"Well," Knives said sitting next to Vash. "I have been a little confused about some things."

"Things like what?"

"Well, about humans really." He said as he began to twiddle his thumbs.

"What are you confused about?"

"Why do they cause feelings and emotions to come about?"

"What, do you like someone?" Vash said poking fun at Knives.

"What, no I, um not exactly, man I don't know." Knives said very Vash like.

"You mean you do like someone I was just kidding, who is it?"

"I'm not telling you."

"Well how else am I supposed to help you if I don't even know who were talking about?"

"I don't know use your imagination." He said behaving very Vash like proving their kinship.

"Ok, since you're going to be like that, let's play the guessing game."

"Let's not."

"Ok, it's not Meryl is it?" Vash said in all seriousness.

"No, I would never like that harpy."

"Watch it!" Vash warned.

"Fine, move on."

"Ok, that cute chick down at the saloon, you know the bartender."

"No,"

"The girl at the bakery?"

"No"

"Man, who is it, if it's not Meryl, or those two, that only leaves…" Vash stopped in mid-sentence and looked in utter disbelief that his brother. "You like Milly." Knives put his head into his hands and prepared for the worse.

"AHHHHHHH!" Vash screamed as he pointed and laughed at his brother. "AH, Knives, no." Vash screamed as Knives slammed him into the floor. As the twins wrestled Milly and Meryl returned home. Meryl was amazed at how quickly Knives wounds were healing. Good enough to put Vash in a full nelson.

"Oh my Meryl, should we help him?" Milly asked when she saw that Knives had Vash in a headlock.

"Ignore it Milly." Meryl walked into the kitchen as if nothing was happening.

"Meryl, Help me, please!" Vash screamed at her as she walked by, but it was in vain. "How could you be so cruel?" He said as he began to cry at the irony.

A few hours later after all the commotion had died down Knives again went to his brother to ask his assistance and maybe this time he could make some progress.

"Vash?" Knives called as he walked into his brother's bedroom.

"What's up, bro?" Vash answered as he picks up Alex out of his crib.

"Well it's about what we were talking about earlier, I still don't know what to do, and I'm still confused."

"Oh I see did you try telling her how you feel."

"What do you mean I don't know what I feel? I told you I'm confused."

"Well, what do you feel when you see or think about her?"

"Let's see, whenever she around me I feel light-headed or my stomach feels like mush and I feel like I can't breathe. What spell has this witch put on me?"

"Sounds like you like her."

"What do you mean, like her?"

"You know, like I like Meryl."

"What, that's impossible, she's a weak spider, and I am superior to her. I am not weak like you. I do not like that human scum."

"Fine, fine, don't get so touchy and besides you came to me about it."

"I know I did, and now I'm thinking I shouldn't have, I need to take a walk." With that Knives stormed out of Vash's room into the night air.

Vash felt bad for Knives, but was happy all the same. He was glad that Knives could come to him and ask him questions like that. Before Knives would never ask Vash anything about human, but now he had a crush and was happy. He was happy that Knives was given a second chance, and maybe even found love.

"Man, I sure hope so." Vash said as he walked out the room.

The next day after the girls had returned from a long day at work, Milly and Meryl left for the store to pick up some groceries. The walk to the store was mostly quite and uneventful, mostly because Milly was lost in thought about her currently growing feeling towards Knives. Meryl found that Milly's uncharacteristic silence very disconcerting and immediately knew something was wrong.

"What up Milly?" Meryl asked on their way home.

"Nothing Meryl, why do you ask?" Milly lied as causally as possible.

"Don't give me that, Milly. You're my best friend and I know when something is wrong with you, so what's up." Meryl asked again not taking no for an answer.

"Well Meryl, if I tell you, you can't laugh at me, or get mad." Milly said when she realized that Meryl was not giving up.

"I won't."

"Ok, well, I think I like someone." Milly said when then reached a park bench to sit down on. "And the person I like is well different and very confusing."

"Well who is it."

"I don't want to tell you."

"What, what do you mean you don't want to tell me?"

"Just that I don't want to tell you."

"Well at least let me guess who it is, give me some traits, what's he like?" Meryl asked excited to be challenged.

"Well, he's really cute, intelligent, sophisticated, well built, blonde hair, and blue eyes, but he's really ignorant and stupid and close minded and a real jerk." Milly concluded very heated.

"Wow, if I didn't know any better I would think you were talking about Knives." Meryl said laughing, but when Milly did not laugh Meryl understood. "You do like him, oh my." Meryl took a moment for what she learned to soak in. "How can you like him? He's such a jerk."

"I know," Milly said as they got up to walk home. "But I was so attracted to him when I first saw him, it was so unreal. I mean, at first I thought that I just thought he was cute, but then things changed, very quickly."

"What do you mean, very quickly?" Meryl asked still finding all of this hard to believe.

"Well one day, I went to go check on Knives. When I got there I couldn't stop staring at him, he just looked so peaceful in his sleep, but he wasn't sleep." Milly continued to tell Meryl the happenings of the day.

"You kissed him?" Meryl yelled in disbelief.

"Well he kissed me." Milly said blushing

"Well how was it?" Meryl asked fully interested now.

"What, you're not mad at me for letting him kiss me?"

"No, why would I be mad at you? It's your life and you should do what you want no matter what's others think or say. I had to learn that the hard way." Meryl explained to her troubled friend.

"Wow, Meryl you're the greatest. I thought you were going to be mad at me about this I guess I was wrong. I'm sorry." She started to cry.

"Milly stop it, I already told you that I was not mad, and why are you crying?" Meryl's annoyance was slowly building.

"I know, but I can't help but to cry, you're so great." Milly said blowing her noses on a massive hankie.

"Well that great that you think I'm great, but I want to know if that ass hole can do any damage." Meryl said trying to lighten the mood. Milly immediately started to blush.

"Oh," she sniffed. "Well he's a very good kisser," Now she was blushing fiercely.

"Wow, who would have thought he could do anything with that mouth besides curse." Meryl laughed.

Soon after their talk, the girls returned home. Right as Meryl entered, an excited Vash lifting her off her feet attacked her.

"Vash put me down, now." She said as she started to giggle.

Milly smiled at her friends love for one another, but inwardly she was jealous because she had lost her chance at happiness. 'Maybe I can be that way with Knives... No, that's silly it would never work.' She thought to herself in defeat.

Later that night Knives set pondering on what to do about his problem with Milly. He thought he could ask Vash again, but he was preoccupied with that harpy woman. While in the mist of his deliberation, he felt a small voice tickle his mind.

"What the..." Knives said to himself as he tried to register where the voice in his head was coming from. He knew it was not his brother and it couldn't be Legato, because he was dead, he just couldn't think who it might be. The voice continued to call out to him, but it could not say his entire name it seemed to be calling him Ni.

"Ni," He said aloud. When he did he knew at once where the voice had come from. He made his way down the hall till he reached his brother's and Meryl's room. When he entered the room Alex was standing in his crib with tears in his eyes and a bright red nose.

When he saw Knives he reached for him and when Knives did not move closer, he heard the voice in his head again, but it was louder and more direct. Knives was astonished at his nephews abilities to broadcast his thoughts and was even more amazed that he got it to the person he wanted. It had taken Vash and himself till they were nearly a year to fully develop their telepathy, and by then their minds were way more developed then Alex's.

Knives rushed towards Alex's crib, scooped him into his arms and left out the room to find his brother. When Knives did find Vash he was in a lip lock with Meryl, under normal circumstances Knives would have been disgusted, but now he hardly acknowledges her presence.

"Vash!" Knives yelled at his brother, startling both Vash and Meryl.

"What Knives, this is a really bad time." Vash said very annoyed at his brother's terrible timing.

"This is important listen," Knives turned his attention to Alex. 'Alex, say my name again.' Knives said telepathically to both Vash and Alex.

"Knives what are you talking about there is no way he able to..."

'Ni,' Cut into Vash's sentence he couldn't believe that his son was able to speak telepathically.

"How did you know he could do that?" Vash asked Knives.

"Well, he called me. While you two were in here sucking face he was in his room crying and I guess he tried to get to you, but you're mind was too clouded." He finished as he looked to Meryl.

"Shut up and what are you two talking about?" She said as she blushed madly.

"So he called me." Knives concluded.

"Wow, my kid is so smart." Vash said very much satisfied with himself totally ignoring Meryl. Vash continued to talk to Knives about something Alex had done and walked away forgetting Meryl was there.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

The next couple of days, Knives devoted all of his time in developing Alex's powers, but for some reason he wouldn't say anything but Ni.

"Come on kid, I know you can do it just concentrate." He pleads with Alex for the millionth time.

"It's not going to work Knives, he's only a baby." Vash said as he entered the room.

"I know he's a baby, but he's part plant and not to mention related to me. So I know he can do it." He retorted

"Well, don't you think after four days he would at lease say your whole name?" Vash said as he began to play peek-a-boo with Alex.

"Yea I guess your right, but I still think he needs intensive training everyday." Knives said as he stood to his full height.

"Whatever Knives," Vash said seeing right through his brother. "I know this is just a distraction so you don't have to confront your feeling for Milly."

"What, that's not it at all and I don't have feelings for the imbecile." He said matter of factly.

"Oh so I guess those butterflies you get whenever she's around are normal, you know I can sense when you're distressed."

"Shut up, you don't know anything, and I don't like her!" He yelled at his brother as he left the room.

"He so naive Alex." Vash said as he too left the room.

"Ni." Alex responded.

'What the hell is wrong with him,' Knives yelled to himself as he stormed outside. 'I know what I feel and I don't have feeling for that filthy human. Her presence disgusts me, she should feel privileged that I even allow her to live let alone touch me'. Knives instantly began to feel better as he fed his ego, but his newfound confidence was short lived.

"Oh, Mr. Knives I didn't know you were out here." Milly said as she walked out the door and onto the porch. She slowly walked towards him as she tried to remain as casual and calm as possible. She stopped a few feet away from him.

Knives tried to repeat his previous thoughts to himself but he couldn't with her so close. The infamous butterflies had returned to his stomach and he was extremely uncomfortable.

Milly looked over to him and saw that he was pale and breathing unevenly she immediately feared that his fever had returned. Instantly all dread and unease was removed from her as she closed the gap between them pushing his against the wall.

"Are you ok, Knives? You're so pale. Are you feeling well? Do you need to go lie down?" She said as she ran her hand over his face and neck.

Knives heart began. He tried to remain as cold as possible, but failed as his body began to react to her. Goose bumps began to cover his body and he felt a sudden urge to kiss her again, but he resisted. It was only lust and nothing more. But Knives couldn't take her closeness anymore so he grabbed her wrist pulling her hands away from his face, surprising her.

"I'm fine." He said calmly.

"Oh, I was just worried that you weren't feeling well." She said realizing how close they were.

Knives was lost in her blue eyes, he allowed himself to swim in the ocean of her stare. He felt so relaxed and didn't realize that he still had her wrist. Milly too was lost in the intensity of his stare and wanted so badly to open herself up to him to allow him to a place where only one man had ever been, but she knew she could not. With that she closed her eyes breaking their moment and pulled away.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Knives. I didn't mean to attack you like that I'm just worried." Milly said as she stepped away from him.

Knives pushed himself off the wall and walked over to the banister. He didn't talk or think he just stood staring out into the vast desert world. Milly joined him wondering what he was thinking, wondering why he affected her so much.

'What should I do Nick' She thought to herself.

She knew that whatever feelings she had for Knives however confusing would be betraying Wolfwood, but Milly never felt so strongly for anybody, not even Wolfwood. She didn't understand, things like this don't happen over night, they take time and patience. But she was living proof and her feelings have never lied before.

That night Knives lay in his bed unable to sleep. He couldn't stop thinking of Milly. He wondered why he had never felt this way until now. Why did she make him feel this way? And what exactly were these feelings anyway?

Vash had just told him that it was like what he felt for Meryl, but Knives couldn't understand them. In all of his life he had never remotely felt so strongly for one person, besides Vash.

He quickly grew tired of her image haunting his thought.

"That's enough, this is ridiculous. I am Millions Knives and I hate, no despise humans. It's just my condition as soon as I heal I will no longer feel this way about her. Yes so I just have to ride it out until I am properly healed. Resistance is key." Knives felt a little bit better, but deep down he knew that he was lying.

He laid there a few more hours trying to stop thinking, for once Knives wished that he could turn off his overactive brain. For once he envied his brother. As if on cue Vash burst through Knives' door surprising the moody man.

"Will you cut it out!" Vash whispered loudly. "I'm trying to sleep."

"What are you talking about? I'm not doing anything." Knives responded confused.

"You've been broadcasting your thoughts all night and disturbing me and Alex. Just go to sleep!" He said as he sat next to his brother.

Knives looked at Vash even more confused then when he walked in. 'You mean my thoughts were so clouded that I dropped my barriers?' Knives thought, but Vash poking him in his arm cut his pondering short.

"Stop it, Knives." He whined rubbing his tired eyes.

"I tried, I can't. How do you think I feel? I can't clear my head for a second. This is crazy." Knives said as he began to pace the floor in his frustration.

"What do you mean you can't? You've always been able to control that, Knives. That's like, your specialty."

"I know, but for some reason I can't." Knives threw his hands up to emphasis his distress.

"Well, judging from what you've been thinking about I know exactly why you can't and she's peacefully sleeping in the next room." Vash said smirking at his brother.

"Yea well it's just because I'm not in full health, that's the only explanation." Knives explained as he returned to his bed.

"Knives, you have always been one for believing stupid theories, but do you honestly believe that?"

Knives wanted to tell his brother that he did, that his feelings were just some side effect from his wounds but he couldn't bring himself to say it.

"Knives, I think you need to confront her. Tell her how you feel. And I know you don't fully understand them, but maybe she can help you, maybe she feels the same way." Vash smiled a knowing smile and Knives knew that smile it meant Vash knew something he didn't.

"Tell me." Knives said calmly to his brother. Vash began to cower away from his brother sensing the attack that was coming.

"No Knives, go and find out for yourself." Vash said with false confidence. Vash hoped that Knives couldn't see that he was nervous, but thanks to his preoccupied mind he couldn't.

"Fine I will, but not now I'm tired." Knives said as he returned to bed

"Wow you are such a chicken, but I see you are not going to do anything tonight. So can you please turn your head off, your making me blush with those dirty thoughts." Vash teased his brother as he left the room. For the rest of the night Knives managed to keep his thoughts and feelings to himself but he never got any sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

The next couple of weeks passed without incident, no one had tried to attack Vash or anything. Things haven't been this quite since he went by the name Erics, and Vash liked the feeling. Besides it would be a lot harder to run from bounty hunters with a toddler, so for Alex's safety he hoped things stayed quite.

Although things appeared quite on the outside, Knives was going crazy. His wounds were all healed and he was in perfect health, but his feelings for Milly had not gone away but grown.

Things had gotten so bad that he couldn't even formulate a coherent sentence or thought when she was around. He hated feeling the butterflies that had seemed to find their home in the pit of his gut.

Vash continued to tell him that he needed to confront his feelings but Knives steadily denied them.

Things were also bad for Milly, although she was not as obvious as Knives she still had a strong urge to tackle Knives whenever he entered the room. Milly had become ashamed of herself for being so sexual attracted to Knives. She tried to think of Wolfwood, but she could not push Knives out of her head. One day Milly grew tired of their growing number of awkward moments. So she decided to ask for some help.

"Meryl, can I talk to you." Milly stepped in the kitchen timidly. She twiddled her thumbs nervously.

"Sure Milly what's the issue?" Meryl didn't look up at her friend and didn't notice her nervousness.

"I think I want to tell Knives how I feel." At this, Meryl's head shot up.

"Really?" Meryl smiled wide.

"Yeah, I'm just tired of all this awkwardness. It's exhausting." Milly rolled her eyes. "It's just that, I've never told a man how I feel. They just seem to always come to me. I've never dealt with someone like Knives and well…" Milly looked nervously towards Meryl.

"Spit it out, Milly." Meryl yelled growing impatient.

"Well, you have, with Mr. Vash." Meryl's heart dropped.

"Milly I'm sorry, but Knives and Vash are so different. They might be brothers, but they couldn't be more different.

"I know that, I just thought that since you and Mr. Vash found a way, maybe…"

"Why don't you just try, Milly?" Meryl grabbed her friend's hand, trying to calm her.

"I can't,"

"Why not?"

"I don't really know what I feel. I thought you could help me decipher what I'm feeling. He confuses me. I shouldn't like him, Meryl. He's the reason Nick is dead." Meryl thought about Wolfwood. She missed him. She hadn't thought about that. She could see how having feeling for Knives was difficult for Milly. She had something with Wolfwood, and Knives indirectly caused his death.

"I think this was a bad idea." Milly said as her eyes began to burn with tears.

Soon the floodgates burst and Milly lost it she began to cry.

"I'm sorry Milly I didn't mean to…"

"It's not you Meryl," Milly said cutting her off. "It's just that I'm so confused. I'm so alllloooonnne." She whined allowing her head to hit the table.

Just as Milly unleashed her tears, Vash walked into the kitchen. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the women.

"I just wish this was easier, Meryl. Why does he have to be so complicated?" Vash assumed she was talking about Knives. Meryl tries to console her friend and Vash went to escape the sea of emotions, but ran into a roadblock.

"What the hell is going on in here?" Knives asked looking quite angry.

"Oh Knives," Vash said as he pulled his brother into the hallway. "Ok, I think this is your chance." Vash said as he peeked back into the kitchen once the twins were alone. Knives stared at his brother in confusion trying to follow him.

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean, I think now is a perfect time to tell Milly how you feel." He said pulling him into the living room to escape Milly's wails.

"Are you crazy, I'm not going in their while she all emotional. I've been watching humans for a century and if I have learned one thing it that an emotion female is a dangerous creature." He said to his brother.

"Yea, maybe your right." Vash said as they entered the living room.

"And besides I have nothing to tell her." Vash stared at his brother in disbelief.

"You have got to be kidding me, you are so stubborn. You have been walking around on egg shells around her for two months now. For once in your life something good is trying to happen to you and you won't take advantage because of your stupid principals. Knives I know that I'm not the smart one, but for the first time in over a century I am truly happy. When I allowed Meryl in, I gained so much. I have a beautiful son and a person who will love me through whatever. Why can't you let her in?"

Knives listened to his brother and soaked in every word. He wanted that, he wanted what his brother had, but years of feeding himself human hating philosophies was holding him back. He could let her in but, he never could, she was human she was everything he hated, and worse of all she was like Rem.

Everything about her made him think of Rem, her forgiving nature, her kindness, especially her kindness towards him. She took care of him knowing that he was the reason for the priest's death, yet she forgave him.

She did not hate him or fear him, she only cared for him and he hated her for it. He hated her because she had dug a hole into his heart and now he needed her.

Yes, he had promised his brother that he was done with killing, but Milly was the real reason. He could not bring himself to make her sad, it would break his heart. Because of her the world was safe from Millions Knives.

When she was around the nervousness and butterfly were there, but the hate and malice was gone. When Milly was around he was at peace and he liked that feeling, he wanted it to stay, but it couldn't.

"Knives?' Vash said interrupting his brother thoughts.

"I can't Vash."

"Why not?"

"Because it's too complicated."

"No I think you're scared, I think you're afraid that I'm right, you always have been that way. You had to be right and I was always wrong, well guess what Knives, nobody is on your side! Nobody ever was and it's time you realized it."

Knives was taken aback by Vash's sudden outburst. He had never spoken to Knives so harshly. He was impressed and hurt.

"This has nothing to do with you Vash." He barely whispered. The house was now quite. Milly had stopped crying. She and Meryl stood in the doorway of the kitchen, watching the twins. Oblivious to their presence, Knives continued.

"I'm so wrapped up in myself that I don't want to change, things are so much easier this way. You don't understand. If I accept what I am feeling that means that my entire life has been a lie. Everything in my past was a big waste if time. Unlike you Vash, I can't change so quickly, I need time to change."

Noticing that they were still undetected by the twins, the girls quickly hid behind the door to listen.

"She haunts my thoughts and my dreams Vash, I hate the way I feel when she around. I can't talk or think. I feel, I feel," He stood in his frustration. "I don't know what I feel, this is crazy."

"Maybe you love her Knives."

Milly's heart was racing. Could Knives love her? She was excited and fearful for the answer.

"I've never loved anyone besides you in my life. And I don't feel that way about you Vash." Vash laughed at his brother's ignorance.

"I'm your brother, of course you love me. This kind of love is different. This love is something you can't live without. It's hard to explain, but when you know you're found the one you just know. You want to spend everyday with this person, you're not really happy unless they're in your arms. Everything about them you love."

Knives knew that this is what he felt, but how could he had fallen in love so easily and he didn't know it had happen.

"Well, what the cure for it, every emotion has a remedy." He asked hopefully.

"There is no cure, love is lifelong you never can cure love. But only one thing can help."

"What?"

But before Vash could answer him Milly burst through the door surprising the brothers. Before the butterflies could settle in his stomach Knives found himself being smothered in a sea of Milly. She had pushed him down on the couch and kissed him with all the might in her body.

Knives was so in shock that he didn't react right away, but when he felt her tongue brush softly across his lips he began to kiss her back.

"That," Vash said as Meryl entered the room.

"Finally, they were driving me crazy." She said as she set on Vash's lap.

"Well at lease you don't have dirty thought be broadcast to you all night."

The next day Alex got a bad fever and Meryl had to take him to the doctor, leaving Vash with Milly and Knives.

"So bro, how does it feel to have a girlfriend?" Knives looked up at his brother in annoyance.

"I don't have a girlfriend." He responded calmly.

"Well a friend with benefits, I know I loved it." He said popping a mini donut into his mouth.

"It's not like that, she nothing. I mean things aren't any different." Vash stopped in mid chew and looked in disbelief at his brother.

"What the hell do you mean not any different? The last time I saw you, you and Milly were doing some serious making out. I think that would change things a bit."

"Well it didn't, it just made things worse." He said in defeat.

"How so, Knives?"

"When you and that venom spitting harpy left the room things just got awkward and uncomfortable. She got up and ran and I haven't seen her since then and I'm not looking forward to it." He said in a melancholy mood.

"Oh, well at lease you know how she feels, right?" Vash said in a failed attempt to make his brother feel better.

"Yea, whatever. I need some air." Vash watched as his brother walked out the door and into the harsh desert weather.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

"Why does thing have to be so difficult?" Milly said to her dark room through tearful eyes.

She had been crying all day. She was so confused. She felt that her wanting to be with Knives was betraying Nicholas. She wished that she could talk to her big sister about this. She would know what to do.

She was so tired of being confused, she was sick to her stomach of it. She wish that someone could show her the way, she knew that Knives was not someone that would wait around forever for her to make up her mind, but she needed time to sort out her feelings.

'He's the one responsible for Nicholas' death, I know he order it. But for some reason I can't hold that against him, I wish that I could. This would be so much easier. I want to hate Knives for killing Nick but I can't. Why do I always fall for the one's with issues, it's not fair.' She thought to herself. She was so tired of being hurt and confused all she wanted to do was rest and her body agreed. Soon Milly was sound asleep.

However Knives wasn't as lucky he set in his room thinking much as Milly was.

'This is stupid. I should have never had stayed this long, this would have never happened. My stupid brother thinks that this is good for me, but it's not. It's a waste of my time and I will not stand for this nonsense any longer. Tomorrow I will tell Vash that I will be leaving for good.' Knives finished his thought with a very satisfied look, however his heart pulled deep within his chest in protest of his plans. But he would not be moved he made was mind up and that was the end of the discussion.

The next morning the tension at the breakfast table was very thick and everyone felt it, even Alex was a little anxious. As always Vash tried to lighten the mood.

"So Meryl what's up for today?" He said looking very falsely interested.

"Huh…" Meryl said looking up from her food surprised, but quickly caught on to Vash's intentions. "Well, I was thinking that we all could go out for dinner tonight."

"Wow that sounds great." Vash replied. "Hey Knives, wouldn't it be cool if we went out?"

"No." was all he replied.

"What?" Vash answered back. "Why not it will be great for you to get out and stretch your legs and get some exercise."

"I'll get plenty of exercise on my travels." Milly looked up at this.

"Travels, what travels?" Vash asked confused.

"I'm leaving today; I've stayed here long enough." He looked up to find Vash and Meryl with an astonished expressions and mouths agape, where as Milly was barely keeping it together. It hurt Knives to see that Milly was about to cry and he couldn't stand to watch her tears fall. He left the room as quickly as possible. Milly left shortly after, running towards her room.

Knives stormed into his room after announcing his intentions to the rest of the household. He knew what he was doing was hurting Milly, which meant it was hurting him. He knew deep down what he wanted.

He knew very well that he wanted nothing more than to walk down the hall to Milly's room and calm her. He wanted to tell her that he wasn't going anywhere that he would never leave her. But he knew he couldn't. He was holding himself back. If he accepted his feeling for Milly his whole life would have been a waste. A lie. So Milly could not be a part of his life the way he wanted her to be.

All I need is some time away and I'll forget all about this and these incessant feeling will be gone. If I leave her here I will not feel this longing for her and I will be me again. I don't need anybody. I am Millions Knives and I have hated humans my entire life and I will not change after a century because of one human. Even if she beautiful. I mean no that type of thinking is what got me into this hell. She is nothing I must think of her as nothing and she will become nothing. Yes that's it nothing. Milly means nothing.

As those last words brushed across Knives' mind he felt a sharp pain pull at his heart. And he knew it was a lie. He couldn't even fool himself into believing that Milly meant nothing to him.

He lay back on his bed and threw his arm over his eyes in an attempt to hide from the world. This however was the wrong move because as soon as his eyelids closed off the rays from the twin suns and image of Milly's smiling face appeared. He immediately popped up and let out a breath of frustration.

"What have you done to me beautiful spider?" He whispered into the empty room. "Why can't I remove you from my thoughts?"

Milly's body was stretched across her bed with her face buried deep in her pillow. She tried to muffle her cries with the feather filled cloud but she knew it was no match for her sobs. She just couldn't believe that he was leaving and what's more important, that she was crying because of it. She hadn't slept long. She just couldn't relax.

If anything she should be happy that he is leaving because she could work on forgetting him. 'Yea Milly, come on girl, you don't need to cry. His leaving is a good thing. You can start over and forget him. You don't need Knives and if he's gone you can't love him.'

Milly began to cry again because she knew that she would never forget Knives. Regardless if she was betraying Wolfwood she knew she loved Knives and that he would be all she ever wanted. No other man would ever compare to him. She loved him for the man he was, flaws and all. She knew that Knives had done evil things, but she just couldn't allow herself to hate him because of it. In the few months that he had been there she had become to love who he was. Not the man that Vash had told her about but the vulnerable and scared person. The man who just needed someone to love him.

Vash had told her about their past and how badly the crew treated them. So she could understand how he could develop hateful feeling for people like that. She could even understand his overall hate for the human race. But what she couldn't understand was why he was kissing her. She had never thought about this till now and very much wanted an answer.

Momentarily forgetting her sorrow, she rose from her bed to ask the only other person besides Knives that would know, Vash.

Vash and Meryl stood over Alex's crib watching him sleep for the first time in two days. His fever had finally broken and he was able to get some sleep.

"I'm so glad he's finally sleeping." Meryl let out a very tired sigh as she collapsed onto their bed. A legendary gunman that was just as tired shortly followed her.

"Yea, me too." Vash responded. However his mind was not on his son and Meryl but on his melancholy brother and his plans. He couldn't stop thinking about his announcement earlier.

'If Knives leaves he'll kill again. He might try and get Alex or the girls. I can't let him leave. I have to convince him to stay. He might even try and hurt Milly to make his feeling go away. I need to stop him.'

"Vash?" Meryl said after saying a few more unanswered statements.

He looked over to her upon hearing his name. His face was familiar to Meryl. It was the same face he wore when he told her he was leaving.

"What's wrong, Vash?" She softly caressed his face. She knew full well why he was distressed but she needs to let him know he could talk to her. She feared that he would clam up and carry this alone.

'I'm here for you Vash. You're no longer alone. Please let me in.' She thought with want swimming in her eyes.

Before Vash could answer a knock on the door broke their moment and saved Vash from an unwanted situation.

"Come in." Vash announced, welcoming the distraction. He knew that Meryl wanted to know his thoughts and that she thought she could help, but he knew Knives. He knew that his brother would go to any lengths to hurt him or make himself feel better, and Meryl would not understand.

"Mr. Vash?" Milly said in a small voice as she walked through the door.

"Yea, what's up Milly?" He responded rising from the bed.

"I need to talk to you about something, do you mind?" She gestured towards the door, telling him she wanted to talk alone. Vash got her intention and walked towards the door.

"Sure Milly." He smiled and gestured for her to lead the way. When Milly had left the room he turned to Meryl and smiled at her. He gave her a smile telling her that he'll try and then he turned and left.

"What's on your mind Milly?" he said once they reached to porch. The door closed silently behind him.

"It's about Knives." She said, although she knew that Vash was fully aware of this fact. " Knives hates humans, right?"

Vash was shocked by her questions. Where was this coming from? He stared at her for a while before answering her.

"Yea," he said slowly still not understanding what this knowledge would do for Milly.

"Right, that's what I thought." She said more to herself than to Vash. Upon getting her answer Milly basically checked out. She stood in front of Vash mumbling to herself quietly with her arms folded across her body.

As she was staring off into space, Vash stood lost and confused. 'What is this all about?' Vash asked himself.

"Milly?" He said looking sideways at his friends.

Milly looked up at Vash blushing realizing how silly she must have looked.

"I'm sorry Mr. Vash." She tried to cover her cheery colored face but her efforts were in vain.

"Milly, why are you asking me this?"

"Well Vash, it's simply really if you're brother hates humans then why…" Milly voice trailed off and became silent. She slowly looked down to the ground as if looking for strength from it. She felt the burn of tears as they threaten to escape.

"Milly?" Vash said reminding her he was there. "Why what?"

The tears were no longing building but running freely down her soft cheeks. She looked at Vash as if her heart would jump out of her chest at that moment. She looked the same way she did when he returned with the news of Wolfwood's death. She wore the look of knowing, but needing conformation.

"Why me Vash, why does he make me feel this way? Why when he will never really love me? He hates what I am and I can't change that. He sees me as what he's hated for his whole life. Yet I can't hate him for that. I can't tell myself that this is pointless. That he will never be any good for me or anybody else. I know that he killed Nick, but I can't blame him for that either. Why Vash why is this so hard? Why can't I just hate him likes he hates me? Then everything would be easy and my heart wouldn't hurt so much. Why…" Milly collapsed into Vash's chest as her sorrow over took her. Her body shook violently as she let the river of her pain flow onto Vash's shirt.

Vash felt terrible. He knew that this was not true. He knew that his brother was head over hills for Milly and that he was simply being Knives and fighting it. But how could he tell Milly this. She didn't know how difficult his brother made things. Things were never simply with Knives and Milly was suffering because of his stubbornness.

A few hours later Knives looked around his small room, which had been his home for the last 3 ½ months, making sure he didn't forget anything.

" I have everything I need, I don't need to waste anymore time here." With that said Knives turned on his heels to leave, but there was a small roadblock smiling at him.

"Ni," Alex said pointing to his melancholy uncle.

"Move, I'm leaving." Knives said to Alex expecting him to move without question. However he was greeted with giggles and drool.

'This brat is so like my idiot brother.' Knives thought about Alex's cheerful disposition.

Knives rolled his eyes and began to walk towards the door. When he got there he tried to step over Alex, but for some reason when he lifted his leg it felt suddenly heavier. He looked down to investigate why he had gained 20lbs on his right leg. What he found was a very happy toddler attached to his leg like a leach.

"Let go of me." He demanded to Alex as he softly shook his leg.

Alex held on to Knives leg for dear life as he began to shake slightly harder. Instead of Alex dropping off, as Knives wanted, he was laughing hysterically believing Knives was playing with him. After a few more seconds of trying to shake him off Knives bent over to pry him off. But after trying to pull him he realized that Alex was quite strong.

'Huh, that's that plant in him.' Knives thought with a smirk. He also realized that the only way to move Alex would be to hurt him. Knives frowned at this thought. He didn't like the idea of hurting him. The 'old' Knives would have done it in a second without a second guess. But now thing were different, Knives felt the malice in him melting and this made him uneasy.

'When did I change? When did there become an old me?' He asked himself confused. He never realized that he had become a new person. Never realized that staying here had changed him. He was so caught up in dealing with his feeling for Milly that he didn't notice the change within. However he was not long to ponder on this long because a very aggravated child brought him out of his reverie.

He had yelled Knives name angrily after realizing that he was being ignored. But he soon smiled once he got Knives attention back. However, Knives who was becoming increasing annoyed, did not feel like laughing. He had to remove Alex from his leg.

Knives walked towards Vash and Meryl's room all while dragging a very happy tot. When he reached their room he didn't bother to knock. Upon entering the room he was greeting with a death glare from Vash.

"What?" He said suddenly feeling guilty.

"You're a real jerk, Knives. You know to be so 'logical'," Vash said sarcastically with air quotes to emphasize his point. " You're a real idiot." Vash finished as he poked his brother in his chest.

Knives was confused yet again that day and at a lost for words.

"So you're just going to stand there looking like a thomas' ass. Say something!" He yelled.

Knives was still disoriented so he said the only thing that would come to mind. "You're son." He said as he pointed down. Vash followed his finger with his eyes.

"Don't fucking change the subject Knives. You need to stop running away from your problems and face them like the superior being you claim to be."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Knives yelled back now fully aware and irritated.

"Don't play stupid, you know what I'm talking about."

"No Vash, I don't and I don't care." Knives lied. He knew what, or better whom, his brother was implying. But this was not a discussion he wanted to have. He wanted to leave without any words. He wanted to just go, but Vash was persisting.

"Milly, Knives, Milly!" He screamed at him. Meryl stepped behind him placing her hand gently on his back

"Vash, leave it alone." She begged not wanting the situation to escalade.

"No Meryl, I won't back down. He needs to hear this." He responded to her. "You think that she is some toy that you can just play with when ever you're ready. Well, guess what Knives, she not Legato, she is not some plaything that you can manipulate. She is a person who cares for you and I know you have feeling for her as well. And now you're just going to run away."

Knives stood silent in front of Vash. He was furious. 'How dare he compare her to that mindless piece of shit Legato!' He thought.

He wanted to hurt Vash for even thinking 'his' Milly was anything like Legato. Knives advanced on his brother with anger flashing in his eyes.

"How dare you compare her to that…" Suddenly he stopped. The expression on his face became confused and then, in a flash, it became calm and he began to smile.

"No, dear brother, you're right. She's not a plaything, not a toy. How silly of me to let you think such a thing." He said in a malevolent tone. Right before he continued Milly came out of her room, after hearing the commotion, undetected.

"I'm sorry, brother." He spat viciously. "Let me clarify what I think of Milly for you."

"Knives stop it." Vash pleaded softly to him, knowing full well what Knives was about to do.

"No Vash, you wanted me to confess my 'feelings' for her, right? So you're going to get it. She's scum. Filthy garbage that no one wants here. A useless, meaningless, waste of existence. She is nothing to me and her meager existence is nothing. She is no different than Legato or any other human. I believe I've told you this before Vash. The true nature of humans is all the same. No matter who they are. Do you remember?"

"Stop it Knives you don't mean that!" Vash yelled at his brother.

"No Vash, I mean every word. My 'feelings' for Milly couldn't be clearer. She is a filthy spider and not worth my time or consideration. She is…" But before he could finish is statement Milly interrupted him.

"I'm what, Knives?" She asked calmly as she entered the room.

"Milly don't listen to him, he just being difficult." Vash plead with her.

"No Vash, don't make excuses for him I want to hear what he has to say." Knives immediately regarded every word he spoke. He knew that he didn't mean what he said, but he couldn't take them back and wouldn't take them back. She was a spider to him inferior in every way to him. But yet he did not want to turn and face her.

They set in silence for a few seconds. Everyone holding their breath as the tension thickened. The ticking of the clock and Alex's pleas for attention was all that was heard. Knives knew that he had to say something he had to face her. He slowly bent down and lifted Alex away from his leg and handed him to Vash. Then he slowly turned to face Milly. It hurt to look into her sea blue eyes. He knew the words he was about to speak would hurt her, but he had to.

"You are human. A spider. Everything about you I hate." He said quietly to her. 'At least that how I should feel.' He thought to himself. He knew that Milly was human yet he couldn't hate her.

"Oh, well in that case, have a good trip. I hope I never see you again. You wanna know what I think of you Mr. Knives?" Milly felt the anger building inside of her as Knives felt the remorse and anxiety build in him. "I think you are a selfish, self-centered arrogant lonely man. And that no one will ever love you because you are a cold-blooded murderer and terrible brother. I hope you riot in hell." And with that she stormed out the room.

The three occupants jumped as she slammed her door seconds later.

"Are you happy now, Knives?" Vash asked his brother.

Knives could not answer his brother, he was far from happy and wanted nothing more than to run in Milly's room and beg for forgiveness. 'Why should I ask her to forgive me? This is a good thing. If she hates me it will be easier."

"That bullshit and you know it Knives." Vash said to his brother after reading his thoughts. Knives was so distressed over what had just happened that he dropped his mental walls. He slowly turned to his brother feeling lost and confused. He thought this was what he wanted. He did not know how to react to this feeling that was coursing through his body. He was sad. He was sorry. His heart was breaking.

Upon seeing his brothers face Vash rushed to his brother pulling him into a hug and leading him out of the room leaving Meryl and Alex alone.

After the twins were out on the porch, they set quietly for a little while enjoying the night air. Knives plan had backfired. When he thought he would tell his brother those things he never intended for Milly to hear them. They were for him and Vash to hear, not her. He knew he did not feel that way. But if he heard himself say it, if he could convince his brother they were true them maybe it would be easier for him to leave. But she heard and everything was different. He did not know how to handle this.

Vash watched as his brother battles with his feeling. He knew that this was a dangerous state for Knives to be in. He knew that he could easily revert on him. The way he handled this was very important. Vash knew that Knives would sit like that all night if he let him so he was first to break the silence.

"Knives, talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking." Vash said softly to Knives.

Knives turned to look at him, but did not speak right away. "I don't know Vash, in all the years of my life I have never felt…this." he threw his hands up to gesture his distress.

"I thought that," Knives continued. "By leaving it would go away. But when you compared her to Legato, I became so angry, I was furious that you would even speak her name in the same sentence as his. I wanted to hurt you, not her. But what is done is done. I cannot change it."

"That's not true, Knives. You could apologize to her now. I mean, I have never heard Milly speak that way to anyone but, I'm sure she will forgive you. If you try." Vash said hopefully to his brother, but he knew it was in vain.

"No. This changes nothing I still must leave. I must have time to think clearly. I cannot stay here any longer, Vash. I have changed. I know that now. But I am still Knives and I travel alone. I cannot stay here." He repeated softly to himself.

"Knives, you don't have to go." Vash plead with his brother.

"No I must. For you." He stood slowly and looked off into the setting double suns. "And for her" He whisper quietly. With that he walked back into the house and picked up his belongings and left.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Knives had been walking for nearly a week and only stopped to rest, which wasn't often. He didn't stay long in any town. He found his irritation for humans was not as severe as it in the past. This bothered him. Why was he different? What happened to him in 3 months? He had developed his utter hatred for human over a century and now he could tolerate their presence and rarely though about killing anyone.

'I hope I'm not turning soft like Vash' Knives thought, as he wiped the sweat from his face. The twin suns beamed down on the surly plant with no mercy as he traveled. As he thought of his brother and his loving nature his mind drifted back to their brief childhood and Rem. The woman he loved and hated. She nurtured and raised him and Vash and taught them love and compassion.

She showed them how to care for others and appreciate life. But only Vash understood these things Knives found it difficult to see beyond the pure ignorance of the human race because of one man. Steve had single handedly ruined Knives' innocents and created a monster. He knew that now, he only wished he had seen in sooner. But now when he thought about Steve he couldn't blame all humans for his transgression anymore because that would mean she was guilty too.

Milly had changed everything. Nothing made sense anymore. 'I want to hate you so much.' he thought. But he knew he loved her. He wasn't sure when or how it happened, but it did.

"I can't love a spider." The sand sprinkled wind rushed up round him warning of the impeding storm. "She is like all the rest, imperfect and she does not deserve the air that fills her lungs." He spoke into the desert around him. This had become him mantra since he left, but no matter how often he said it he never believed it.

Knives was getting tired and had to find shelter soon before the storm. He saw a small formation of rocks in the distance that would hide him from bandits and animals and protect him from the storm. By the time he made it over it was almost nightfall and the winds had picked up.

"Finally I can rest." He said after setting up for the night. Knives was very tired and ready to sleep. He got comfortable as possible and closed his eyes to rest.

A month had passed since I left my brother. Three weeks since I had last seen Milly. My heart ached at the thought of her. She plagued my mind constantly. I was never free from her image, her voice, her smell, but most of all her smile. I saw it each time I closed my eyes. There was nothing I could do. I tried drowning myself in alcohol. It seemed to work for weak human scum. However, I soon learned that the alcohol just gave you an excuse to bitch and moan about your problems without shame. To openly damn what ailed you. I resolved, after a night of dry heaving and the worst headache I've ever had in my life, to never drink again. I tried depriving myself of sleep, but that didn't last too long. I nearly feel off the thomas I has stolen from a nearby farm. Every remedy seemed inadequate in freeing my mind of her. I sit now in a filthy human bar, staring at my reflection in the glass before me, wishing, more than anything that I could think of something else.

"You want a refill, handsome." A twenty something waitress stood before me with a hand on her hip waiting on my reply. She had been hovering around since I came in, trying her hardest to get my attention. Stupid human bitch, I thought as I stared up at her. Her medium length sandy hair lightly touched the top of her bare shoulder. She smiled.

"Like what you see?" She asked seductively. I smirked. Her confidence amused me. Before I would have killed this woman by now, but I just didn't feel the need. Instead, I thought I would entertain her.

"Sure," I replied, looking back to my nearly empty glass. She was an attractive woman. Petite with full round lips, which she was pouting for me right this second. I was mildly attracted to her, but nothing serious.

"Oh, is that so." She leaned in closer, revealing a little cleavage. "What's your name, cutie?" she whispered. What a slut. Milly would never make it this easy.

"Knives," she smiled again.

"I'm Luanne, Knives. Pleased to meet you." She extended her hand towards me, expecting me to take it. I did. My increased tolerance for this human garbage was amazing me.

"So how about that refill, Luanne?" I asked. She winked as she picked up my glass and walked away. She definitely put a twist in her hip for me as she walked away. I shook my head in amusement and disgust as she disappeared behind the bar.

When she came back with my drink, she slipped her address in my hand and walked away. I stared down at the napkin that she had scribbled her name and address on.

"I wonder," I whispered. Maybe sleeping with someone would get rid of Milly. Maybe I'm just in need to a physical release.

My eyes bounced across the words again and again as I contemplated my next move.

What the hell am I thinking? Having sex with this human is crazy. I have to clear my head. Ever since I met that woman, I haven't been myself. I haven't killed anyone since I left and I've have more than enough opportunities. Milly, what have you done to me? Why does this have to be so difficult? I wish you were here. I would love to touch you right now. To hold you. To feel your soft lips against my own. You set fire to my skin whenever you touch me. Stop it Knives.

My fist pound down on the table before me as I thought my last words. I have to get over this.

I paid for my drink and walked towards the bar where Luanne stood. She smiled as I moved towards her.

"What time are you done here?" Her eyes light up as my words crossed her ears.

"Seven,"

"See you later then," I left the bar feeling anxious, not about the sex, but the thought of being free of Milly for good.

My plan had backfired. Being away from her only made me feel worse. I missed the awkward moments. At least they were better than constant longing. I knew Milly was no good for me, or better that I was no good for her. I would only hurt her. She was too pure, too delicate for someone like me. But none of that mattered now. Soon I would be releasing all of this onto Luanne, and I would be free to live my life without her.

The day dragged, as Knives lay, restless in his bed. He watched as the twin suns refused to set quicker. It was nearly 6:30 and Luanne would be done with work and his mind would be clear. His long leg dangled lazily over the other as he huffed impatiently. In the time he had resolved to sleep with the young waitress a sea of emotions had washed over him.

Although the thought of being Milly free seemed great, the more his mind digested it, the less his heart like it. He thought of just leaving town and drifting on, but the appeal was too great. He had to do this. It was his last resort.

Before he realized, Knives drifted off to sleep.

"Knives," a voice yelled into pitch-blackness. Knives jerked up. His eyes couldn't adjust to the darkness all around him. Someone called his name.

"Knives," it yelled again. He knew the voice, but he couldn't tell from where. He started to walk. He had no idea where he was or where he was going.

"Who's there?" he screamed back.

"Knives, can you find me? Are you looking? Don't lose me, Knives. Don't let me drift away." He face screwed up in confusion. What is this person talking about? He wasn't looking for anyone.

"Who are you?" he repeated. His feet continued to carry him somewhere unknown.

"You know who I am, Knives." The voice seemed to whisper although the sound screamed all around him.

"I do, but…"

"Follow my voice, Knives. Find me." The voice interrupted. "Find me." It said again. Knives obeyed. He walked for a long time in the darkness. He couldn't see his own hand in front of his face. _This is crazy_, he though.

"Find me," continued to ring about his mind. He walked on, unable to will his feet to stop. Suddenly, the place became quiet. Not even silent, by completely void of noise. Knives' heart began to race, he didn't like the quiet, he missed the voice. Longed for it to return.

"Where are you?" He screamed. The panic in his voice frightened him. He needed the voice to come back. He wanted to feel its vibrations around him. He reached up to touch his face, he was crying. Knives fell to his knees, hugging his body. He felt as helpless as a child.

"Don't cry, Knives." It was the voice. It had returned.

"Where did you go?" Knives whimpered.

"You didn't want to find me. You wanted me to go away." The voice seemed to be getting closer to where he sat. A faint light flicked in the distance. Knives' eyes grew as it came closer to him. As if connected, the voice and the light came closer at the same pace.

"You don't want me. So I went away. Like you wanted. I left you here, Knives, in the dark."

"Please don't go anymore. I want you to stay." Knives felt a warmth wash over him as the light clawed up his leg toward his face. Knives saw someone walking in the light. A woman.

"Who are you?" he asked again. He couldn't see her face. She moved closer to him revealing herself to him.

"You know me, Knives." She smiled at him.

"Milly?" a mixture of confusion and panic took over. Knives pushed away from her. He frantically moved backwards into the darkness.

"You can't be here. I don't need you."

"But you said you want me to stay, Knives." Knives cover his ears, trying to muff out the sound of her voice. "Go away! You've messed everything up. I want to hate you. Why can't I hate you?" He roared at her. Milly's face dropped at his words. The hurt they caused her seemed to ricochet back to Knives. He felt her pain. The pain he caused her.

"Stop it," he stood to his feet. "Stop haunting me, please." His head hung in defeat. Milly walked towards him, cautiously. He felt her getting closer, but did not move away. He let her place her hand on his cheek. He let her pull him into her body. She smelled the same. Knives inhaled her as he nuzzled into her neck. Milly drew small circles on his back attempting to calm him.

"I just want to bring you out of the darkness, Knives. I want to be your beacon." Milly words were muffled into his chest, but he heard them as if she whispered them into his ear. "Why won't you let me, Knives? Why are you pushing me away?"

Knives was drenched in sweat. The moons were high in the night sky as his rolled out of bed. _What a crazy dream, _he thought as he walked towards the bathroom. Regardless of his dream, Knives still intended to visit the waitress. If anything, it only solidified why he had to rid himself of Milly. He was a whimpering baby in his dream. He didn't want to be that way. No matter how amazing it felt to hold her.

A while later, Knives walked up to the address that matched the one written on the crimpled napkin in his hand.

"Here we go," He whispered in the crisp night air. He banged on the door three times before she came. She looked a lot different in the moonlight than when he saw her in the dim dusty light of the saloon.

"I thought you stood me up," she pushed the door open wider allowing him entrance. Knives walked pass her into the small house. A tiny kitchen sat to the left of him. Nice and clean. At least she wasn't one of those disgusting humans that let their homes get disgusting. Straight ahead of him was a dainty looking living room, covered in red. Everything was red, down to the paint on the walls. A dark hallway stretched right of him.

"You coming?" she asked as she walked down the hallway. Knives followed her to his freedom. A tiny bedroom was at the end of the short hallway. She was sitting crossed legged on the bed staring at him suggestively. Knives walked directly to where she sat. He kissed her, hard, but it lacked passion. It was desperate. He pushed his body forwards, forcing her to lie back on the bed. He quickly removed his jacket and place is hand over her cloth breast. She moaned at the action.

"Man, you don't waste time?" she giggled. Knives only smiled in response. She began to run her had over his shirted chest. Soon she undid the buttons and it too joined his jacket on the floor. Knives mimicked her actions and removed his nightshirt. He was happy to see that was all he needed to remove. She was completely naked under it.

Knives stood before her naked body, only in his pants. This was it, the moment of truth. The moment where Milly would be come a distant memory. He was certain once he slept with the girl all this nonsense would stop. He smiled at himself and attacked his prey.

The next morning, Knives woke in a strange bed. He glanced around and immediately got defensive, but before he reached for his gun, the memories of the night before flooded his mind. He had slept with that human woman. It was enjoyable, it always was. He had learned long ago that even thought he was a plant and was superior to humans and wanted their death, he was also a man. This fact he couldn't deny. He needed sex just like he needed sleep or food.

Luanne lay next to him snoring softly. He brown hair was swept over her face. Knives remember their time together. She was most definitely experienced and pleased him well. He watched the rise and fall of her exposed breast as she slept. She was nice to look at.

"You know it's rude to stare." She whispered, startling him. Milly had said that to him. Damn! He ripped his eyes away and moved to get out the bed. Luanne rose up and watched his naked body move about her room getting his clothes.

"Who's Milly?" He stopped and turned towards her. His clothes dropped to the ground. The thud of his gun hitting the floor rang in this ear.

"What did you say?"

"Milly, who is she? You said her name a few times in your sleep. An old girlfriend? " Luann noticed how uncomfortable he had become. This intrigued her more. "Were you trying to forget her, Knives?" She lifted to her knees and allowed the blanket to slip from her body, exposing herself to him. "Maybe you need another dose of Luanne to forget her." She touched herself playfully.

Knives watched her try to seduce him, but was too distracted to care. This didn't work either. Milly was still a part of him. His eyes dropped to the floor, forgetting Luanne's presence. She noticed the neglect and walked over to him.

"What's wrong, Knives. I can help you forget. Come on." She took his hand and let him back to the bed. She pushed him down and straddled him. She began to kiss his neck.

"I don't know what to do, Milly." He whispered.

"I can be Milly for you, Knives. Would you like that?" Luanne continued to kiss on his body. Suddenly, Knives pushed her off, violently.

"What the hell?" She yelled.

"You can never be her, slut." Knives got to his feet and collected his clothes. _I should kill that bitch for comparing herself to Milly. Stupid spider._ Knives thought as he dressed himself.

"Don't call me a slut, jerk." Luanne screamed as she pulled herself off the floor.

"I just call it how I see it." He replied coldly as he left the room.

Knives walked out into the blazing double suns. He was so flustered. This was a mistake. He knew that now. Not even sleeping with someone else made Milly go away. His mind was racing. He wanted to vomit. He felt sick and wanted nothing more than to run back to the town where Milly was and apologize. He hated what he had done and felt dirty.

_What is wrong with me? _He thought as he walked back to the hotel to get his stuff. He had stayed in this town too long. It was time to move on.


End file.
